tATu
by AlwaysNotUpdating
Summary: This girl loves that girl. It seems that no one approves, but some things are meant to be. These thing will shatter fate and reveal the truth behind the opposition. COMPLETE! And please, if you don't like, don't read.
1. All the Things She Said

**A/N: There is a lot of Misto/Tugger on here but not much femslash. So to be fair I had to write this.**

**The title of this story is temporary. I chose it for more than one reason. Yes, it's named after the Russian duo. Most of this chapter is based off of their song, All the Things She Said. t.A.T.u. is short for the Russian phrase: Eta devushka lyubit tu devushku. I'm not Russian but apparently that translates to: This girl loves that girl.**

**I don't like doing timeskips, so this has alot of flashback stuff.**

**I'm not sure if I want to continue this, but if you like the idea, please review!**

**_Author's Second Note: (March 3rd, 2010) I appreciate those people who reviewed, even those who flamed. I usually don't mind critics who tell me how to improve and stuff, but those people who tell me I'm sick or perverted because I write about femslash.....if you know this is femslash and still review telling me how sick and perverted I am, that's just weird. So I will add a note._**

**IF YOU DON'T LIKE FEMSLASH (GIRL/GIRL) PAIRINGS AND DO NOT WISH TO BE OPEN MINDED ABOUT IT, THERE IS A BACK BUTTON AT THE TOP OF YOUR BROWSER.**

_

* * *

We try to control our own lives as an author tries to control his/her story. But unlike writing we cannot erase what has happened in the past. A writer can simply look back and decide that something should've happened and create a whole new scene. We can regret and wish but we cannot change._

* * *

Jemima lay down and blinked slowly as the rain poured down heavily upon the roof of her den. A crackle of thunder was heard in the distance and at that she closed her eyes wondering about what had happened a couple of years back. (**A/N: Cat years, I suppose.**)

_Flashback:_

_A mini version of Jemima was running around laughing and playing with her best friend, Victoria, in the middle of a storm. Both were unaware of how dangerous their situation was and focused only on their fun and happiness. Water dripped down their soaked fur as they played tag. A flash of light burst far away and the two kittens looked up in awe. They weren't afraid though. Faintly a voice could be heard calling to the two of them. Still in their state of wonder at nature's work they couldn't hear anything else but the roaring of thunder and the sound of water splashing onto the pavement. Then out of nowhere Munkustrap appeared and grabbed both of them out of the way. Back at the Junkyard the kittens had finally felt the chill of the rain and began to shiver uncontrollably. Victoria had sputtered out, "I'm so cold."_

_Jennyanydots and Jellylorum had taken them to their warm den. Jemima's teeth were chattering quite loudly but she was still smiling remembering the flash of lightning. The white kitten beside her was shivering but laughing too. Jelly smiled at the two silly kittens and wondering how they could be so happy during the rainy weather._

_The two kittens snuggled together for warmth and tried to fall asleep. Jemima was half asleep when she heard Vicky murmur something. It sounded suspiciously like the words, "I love you, Jem."_

_They didn't know at that time that someone other than the two of them had heard the words too._

The rain stopped and her eyes cracked open slowly to see Pouncival grinning wildly down at her. Jemima sighed and rubbed her eyes sleepily and whispered, "What?"

"You're being so boring", Pouncival whined, "Come on let's play a game."

"I'm too tired", she protested, but her words fell upon deaf ears as Pouncival dragged her outside where the sun was shining so brightly that it seemed it had never rained at all.

* * *

A pure white queen stretched slowly as she remembered there was only a week left until the Jellicle Ball and that meant that she'd be able to go to the Junkyard again. A black and white tuxedo cat walked into her room haughtily and said, "Good, you're up. We have to leave soon."

"But the Ball's in a week", Victoria pointed out. Her brother shook his head and replied, "We're going to visit Aunt Jenny on our way so that she can come with us too."

"Right, I knew that", she snapped. Then Mistoffelees left so that she could get ready.

Victoria really couldn't wait for the Jellicle Ball, but thinking about that forced her to remember why she had to move from the Junkyard in the first place. Those memories always brought pain and shame for her so she distracted herself but they came back and wouldn't leave her alone.

_Flashback:_

_Two young kittens were sitting inside a den laughing with each other and not bothering with anyone else. They were so close that they could understand each other with just a look in the eye. One was Jemima and the other was Victoria._

"No that was the past", Victoria shook her head through gritted teeth, but everything was coming back.

_Victoria smiled and hugged her best friend tightly as their first Jellicle Ball started. They went out to the Junkyard to watch the introduction part. Everything went as was supposed to until the Mating Dance._

_Since they were too young to really take part or anything, the two of them sat away from the Jellicles with Jelly watching over them. Then the two who were doing the Mating Dance, Demeter and Munkustrap, kissed each other in a show of affection. Jemima tilted her head in confusion and Victoria giggled while asking Jelly, "Why do they do that?"_

"_Kiss?" Jelly asked in surprise as she nodded. "Well they do that to show they love each other and want to be together for the rest of their lives."_

"_So if I really love someone and want to be with that cat for the rest of my life, I can kiss them?" Victoria asked in confusion. Jelly hesitated since she didn't want a little kitten going around kissing random toms, but it couldn't hurt, could it?_

"_You can, but only when you're absolutely sure that he is the one", Jelly answered. Victoria and Jemima giggled at that and Victoria asked, "He?"_

_Jelly didn't understand the question very well but nodded anyway to assert her authority. Then Victoria leaned forward and kissed Jemima on the cheek and they both giggled. Only then did Jelly realize what was happening, but she didn't know what to say to them. Later the two of them were separated and both received lengthy lectures/talks about the kiss._

_Victoria had been taken aside by her aunt to discuss what had happened. Jenny was blunt and straight to the point._

_"Do you know what love is, Victoria?" Jenny asked while looking down at her. Victoria nodded and said, "It's when you care about someone a lot."_

_"True, but love is beyond that. When you're in love you'll know it and only then do you kiss that someone", Jenny said sternly, "I don't know how to say this so I'll get straight to the point. Queens don't love each other in that way. They love each other in a sisterly way and no more."_

_"Why?"_

_Jenny sighed and smiled. Then she told her the words that every child, kit and puppy hates. "You'll understand when you're older."_

Victoria shook her head and realized that she was older now and still all she understood was that the older Jellicles didn't like the love that she and Jemima had for each other. It was so painful to not understand.

Two days later Victoria and Misto arrived at Jennyanydots' den. After Jenny gushed about how beautiful and grown up the two of them looked the three of them left for the Junkyard. Jenny was keeping a close eye on Victoria however, although Victoria was oblivious. She didn't want what happened last time to happen again.

* * *

Jemima was sitting with Etcetera and Electra in the middle of the Junkyard cleaning herself. Out of nowhere Tumblebrutus leapt and knocked Etcetera down playfully. Soon Pouncival followed suit and soon all 5 were rolling around on the ground. When things had calmed down a bit Tumble asked, "Who's becoming a queen this year?"

Electra replied, "None of us if that's what you're asking."

"Well who's going to do the Mating Dance then?" Tumble asked and Pouncival nudged him playfully to add, "It's not you anyway."

Tumblebrutus rolled his eyes way up to the sky and Jemima followed suit but she couldn't see anything interesting up there. Tumble groaned and said, "I know that, you doofus."

Just then Admetus passed and hearing their conversation he said, "It's that white queen that moved away awhile ago."

Jemima froze with her eyes wide open as Admetus continued, "I think her name is Veronica or something."

"Victoria", Jemima automatically corrected without giving a thought to it. She hadn't known that she was coming back. It had been so long ago to her. Admetus scratched his head and said, "Oh yeah, that's it."

"How did you know?" Tumble asked her warily. Jemima blinked and squeaked, "I have to go!"

With that she scampered off towards her den to hide for a minute but then she slid and almost crashed into another cat. Breaking awkwardly she looked down and mumbled an apology. Then she heard the other cat gasp, "Jemima?"

Looking up Jemima saw her best friend and they looked at each other in surprise. (**A/N: Think about Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. When Ginny sees Harry at the burrow for the first time, that's the look they're giving each other.**)

Behind Victoria, Jenny narrowed her eyes at the scene.

**So any feedback? Please review! This isn't a very popular pairing...so...**


	2. Show Me Love

**A/N: Where I live no one is actually openly gay or lesbian. So I don't know how people usually react. This is what I've heard in stories etc. I read another story where Truth or Dare was used, so I'm using it too. Not a very original idea...**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Thanks for reviewing! I hope you like this chapter too, although I think it's a little boring.**

**To Catdancergirl: That's an excellent idea! I'll definitely use it, although this chapter isn't really based off any song.**

**To Alex0821: It's sort of plot hole, but my answer to that is Jenny is naturally suspicious and a little paranoid....slight spoiler: Later on you'll see why Jenny is especially protective over the two not having any intimacy.**

**To ew: Thank you for your constructive criticism. I don't exactly understand what makes the story so, "gros" and "junk", but if you explain further and tell me how I should better construct this story, I will be very grateful. Thanks!**

**To tATu: I'm not sure what your review means exactly, but thanks anyway!**

**Note: Loosely based on the song, Show me Love.**

* * *

_This was an accident  
Not the kind where sirens sound  
Never even noticed we're suddenly crumbling....  
Do you still have doubts that us having faith makes any sense?_

_Staring at your photograph  
Everything now in the past  
Never felt so lonely..._

* * *

_From previous chapter:_

_Behind Victoria, Jenny narrowed her eyes at the scene.  
_

* * *

Jemima gulped nervously at seeing her friend and faintly remembered all that had happened. Victoria relaxed since she knew that the meeting had been inevitable and had rehearsed the scene over and over in her head, but she hadn't anticipated Jemima would be so frozen. So being the older of the two friends, the pure white queen smiled wide, stepped forward and hugged the calico. In her ear Victoria whispered, "I missed you."

Then she withdrew and the three visitors (Misto, Jenny and Victoria) left to get some rest after their long journey. Jemima watched their retreating figures with a shocked expression still on her face. She had expected something entirely different from the calm way Victoria had greeted her. _Maybe she didn't get the same lecture as I did. _

Flashback:

_Demeter, being Jemima's older sister, talker to her about what had happened. Demeter looked straight at her young, adorable sister and said, "Jelly may not have exactly explained a kiss right. You only give a kiss when you love someone in a certain way."_

_ "What way?" Jemima asked sweetly completely unaware of what her sister was trying to say. Demeter sucked in a big gulp of air and sighed, "When you know that you love someone so much that you can't bear to be away from them. You would sacrifice everything for that one Jellicle. That you want to have a relationship with them and love each other passionately."_

_ Jemima tilted her head as she always did when she didn't understand something. She pouted and asked, "You mean when you love someone and need them to be with you all the time?"_

_ "Yes, it's something like that", Demeter answered, glad that they didn't have to talk about mating or anything. Jemima giggled slightly which surprised her older sister greatly._

_ "But I do love Victoria in that way", she whispered and looked down at her paws in embarrassment. Demeter gasped because she knew that Jemima never lied. _

_ Later on after Demeter had gone to talk with Old Deuteronomy about what had happened, the Jellicle Leader himself had sat down to talk with her. He scratched his carpet-like fur as he spoke, "Do you know who the Everlasting Cat is?"_

_ "The Everlasting Cat?" Jemima asked nervously. She was sure that she was in trouble since the Jellicle Leader wouldn't talk to a little kitten without a purpose. Old Deuteronomy nodded and smiled warmly. Jemima fidgeted and began to stutter, "T-the Everl-lasting Cat c-c-created ev-ev-everything."_

_ "Correct", Old Deuteronomy looked sincerely proud that she knew that and continued, "The Everlasting Cat created us because he or she wanted something to love. He or she created the tom and the queen. These two were meant to be together do you understand that?"_

_ "As m-m-mates?" She vaguely remembered what Jenny had once told the young kittens. Old Deuteronomy nodded and said, "He or she wanted the two to have eternal happiness and love. But since love from a mate is not enough, the Everlasting Cat created more and more so that there would also be friendship."_

_ "Why can't two queens or two toms be mates?" Jemima tilted her head again. Old Deuteronomy answered, "Because it is unacceptable and unnatural, do you understand?"_

_ The little calico nodded even though she hadn't really grasped the concept entirely. Old Deuteronomy nodded and said, "Victoria has to leave for awhile, but it's not your fault or hers. She needs some space and her brother wants her to be closer to him."_

_ "She's leaving?" Jemima squeaked in alarm. The Jellicle Leader nodded and smiled sadly and rasped, "She has probably already left."_

_ "I didn't say good-bye", the tiny kitten looked down. Old Deuteronomy patted her on the head and whispered, "She probably knew that you wanted to. But if she ever comes back, remember you two should probably give each other distance."_

_ Give each other distance._ Those were the words that he had told her, but Victoria had hugged her and it had felt so good to be with her again.

* * *

That night all of the younger Jellicles had gathered together to play a game. At first it was tag but soon they got tired and sat down to rest. Then Etcetera, the most energetic and playful kitten Victoria had ever met, suggested that they play truth or dare. The toms had whined and complained but eventually agreed in the end.

Etcetera, being the person who suggested the idea, spun a small bottle around to choose someone. The cap pointed towards Pouncival who groaned at his bad luck. Etcetera grinned mischievously thinking of all the things she could make him say or do. Pouncival moaned, "Truth."

"Great!" Etcetera cheered and asked, "Did you really kiss Demeter when you were aiming for Bomba?"

Pouncival blushed so hard that he couldn't hide his embarrassment as all the cats present began to laugh. He muttered, "It was an accident."

"So it's true!??!?" Electra squealed in delight. Jemima was covering her ears. _Too much information!_

Then Pouncival spun the bottle and the cap turned to point at Plato who grinned arrogantly. Jemima knew that Plato was never embarrassed and that he was a risk taker. Plato boldly answered, "Dare."

Victoria watched them all gasp at how unafraid he was. She looked at the cheeky tom who winked at her when she caught his gaze. But she didn't give him the pleasure of letting him see her blush.

"Hmmm...what should I dare you to do?" Pouncival asked mocking Plato, but that was never a good idea. Plato smirked and answered sarcastically, "Maybe you should ask me to help you get Bomba."

As everyone laughed, Pouncival pretended not to hear and finally came up with an idea. He smirked and said, "I dare you to ask Jenny out."

Even Victoria's eyes widened since she knew her aunt was a very serious Jellicle and would probably get all mad at Plato. Pouncival's smile was taunting Plato to say yes to his outrageous dare, but the tom was still smiling back. Plato chuckled and said, "Feh, and I thought you were going to give me something challenging."

Pouncival narrowed his eyes at Plato in contempt at his nonchalance. Plato grinned in victory and boasted, "I'll even ask her in front of all of you guys."

"Ask who?" Jelly and Jenny rounded the corner to check up on them. Tumblebrutus sighed, "Speak of the Devil."

_ "_Hey Jenny, you want to go out sometime?" Plato asked with a warm smile. Jenny looked his way with a sharp glance and said, "You guys are playing truth or dare aren't you?"

"How did you know?" Etcetera asked with a jump of excitement. Maybe she could get Jenny and Jelly to join the game.

"Everytime someone plays Truth or Dare one of the dares is to ask me out. I've gotten used to it", answered Jenny. Pouncival's mouth dropped open since he thought his dare was quite original. Then Jenny turned to Plato and said, "I'd rather lick the inside of a city bus."

With that they left to go sew or something. Plato shrugged and spun the bottle until it landed on Jemima who was blushing furiously. Then the tom shrugged and said, "Since I know you'll pick truth no matter what, I'll just ask the question."

He looked at her so arrogantly that she almost rose to his bait and chose dare. But Jemima just kept her mouth shut and nodded. Plato looked thoughtful for a moment before asking, "Have you ever been kissed, and if yes, who and where?"

Etcetera and Electra giggled at the mere thought of Jemima letting herself be kissed. The toms tried to look uninterested but they wanted to know as much as Etcetera wanted to. Victoria was trembling as she thought of what Jemima was going to answer.

"Um...b-but that's thr-three questions, P-Plato", Jemima stuttered before lowering her head. Plato scoffed, "Just answer."

"Yeah", Jemima whispered so softly that if Electra, who was sitting next to her, hadn't been listening closely she wouldn't have heard it. Plato cleared his throat, "What?"

"Yeah", she repeated a little louder. Electra raised her eyebrows while thinking, _Really, Jemima? _Tumble was a little discouraged since he had a crush on her and wondered who had kissed her. When she didn't say anymore, Plato urged her on, "Who and where?"

"I only h-h-have to answer o-one q-question", Jemima muttered. Tumble arched his eyebrow wondering who it was to be such a big scoffed again and said, "Well then it's strike one for you."

"F-fine", Jemima agreed quickly. It was just a game after all. Victoria exhaled quickly and watched as the bottle spun around again. Then a paw reached out and stopped the bottle mid-spin. The younger Jellicles looked up to see Cassandra, Alonzo and Rumpleteazer grinning wildly. Alonzo, the one who was holding the bottle still asked, "Mind if we play?"

So the game began again with three more players and all went well (well meaning that nothing too drastic happened besides Tumble choking when he heard Electra admit that she had once drank Coke) until the bottle landed on Alonzo. He had been quite malicious when he suggested things to dare others to do or ask. Unfortunately, Admetus had been the one who had spun it to him and grinned viciously. Admetus and Alonzo were well-known rivals and things were bound to go wrong.

Alonzo glared and said, "Truth", with a quiet voice. Victoria wondered what was going to happen since there were obvious sparks between Alonzo and Admetus. Then Admetus snarled, "Coward."

Alonzo didn't reply and waited for Admetus to ask the question. Admetus rolled his eyes around thoughtfully before asking, "Out of all the queens here which do you prefer. The truth, Alonzo."

Cassandra tensed and glared at him with a look that said, "You better say me."

Alonzo smirked and yawned, "That's too easy."

"That's because I didn't say the next part. Which one would you pick after Cassandra?"

At that the black and white tom frowned and answered, "Probably Jemima or Victoria."

Jemima's eyes widened as did Victoria's. Cassandra got jealous easily and shouted, "You've barely met, Victoria."

"Cass, I said I would pick them if I didn't have you", Alonzo tried to calm her down, but Admetus had calculated correctly, Cassandra was jealous. The Abyssianian growled, "Whatever, Alonzo, it's not like they'd ever be interested in you."

With that Cassandra sauntered towards Jemima and said, "So many gorgeous toms here."

Jemima gulped nervously at Cassandra's unhidden hatred. Then Cassandra stood up straighter and said, "Too bad Jemima and Victoria aren't interested in any of them."

Then the haughty, hurt queen left the game with her tail waving a goodbye. Victoria was trying to stay calm while Jemima just stammered, "I-I h-h-h-have to g-go now."

Alonzo stopped her and apologized, "I'm sorry for Cassandra's behavior, she isn't usually like this."

"It's f-fine", Jemima tried to leave again, but Alonzo was still in her way. He asked, "By what I tell from Cassandra's words you and Victoria seem to both be taken. So I apologize for naming you two."

"Taken?" Etcetera squealed. _Great._ Jemima gulped again and murmured, "I r-really sh-should be g-g-going now."

"Of course", Alonzo let her leave and said, "I think I'll go find Cassandra."

"So, are you taken?" Plato asked Victoria casually. Victoria turned around in surprise to him and said, "Um...no."

"I hear you're doing the Mating Dance this year", Plato began and plunged straight ahead, "I was wondering if you wanted to do the dance with me."

"Sure, Plato", Victoria answered knowing that she had to accept someone's offer.

* * *

Jemima returned to her den and hid under her covers nearly passing out. Cassandra somehow knew about her relationship Victoria and almost told all of her friends. As she had grown up she realized that it was expected that a queen would be with a tom and anything else would make the others look at her differently.

Jemima felt so lonely all by herself in the den without Demeter or Munkustrap to keep her company. Munkustrap had become sort of like a brother to her over the years and when he had become Protector, he had sworn that he would protect Demeter and Jemima from Macavity. Jemima had once asked her older sister why Macavity hated the two of them so much. Demeter had replied something vague.

Without Victoria the past year had been so painful to go on with. It was like missing a piece of yourself. They had been so close. Jemima missed hanging out with Victoria and playing around. Tears splashed to the ground.

The next day was the Jellicle Ball and she was going to have to go to the Mating Dance with some tom that she didn't really know. Jemima rolled around and fell asleep so fast that she didn't hear Demeter enter a few minutes later.

* * *

Jenny knew that the plan that she and Old Deuteronomy had thought up had truly helped the situation between Victoria and Jemima. The relationship they had had been so close to the one Jenisis had with-

_Don't think about that! _Jenny shook her head to rid herself of such thoughts.

* * *

Not too far away from Jemima's den a pair of eyes glowed dangerously.

**A/N: The beginning was lyrics from the song, Show me Love.**

**People might ask, but Jenisis is just an OC I had to create for later purposes. Please review! This is sort of a mellow (boring) chapter, but next chapter is the Jellicle Ball and hopefully it will be more exciting.**

**I really do love reviews!**


	3. Friend or Foe

**A/N: Sorry for the wait. I have no idea where this story is currently headed, but I'm planning it out. This chapter is a little shorter, so bear with me! This Jellicle Ball is the same Jellicle Ball that happens in CATS, not a different one.**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Thank you for your lovely review! I'm glad you thought it was interesting. Hope this holds your interest!**

**To Alex0821: I have continued. I didn't realize it was difficult to read Jemima's dialogue, so I apologize! This chapter doesn't really include much dialogue anyway, though.**

**To Alphoscapsy-cola: Everyone like a bit of originality here and there! Thanks!**

**Note: This chapter is based on the song, Friend or Foe. I have a video of Jem/Vic to this song. The URL is: youtube (dot) com/watch?v=bb6yRIbnqPw**

* * *

_We used to love one another  
Give to each other  
Lie undercover so,  
Are you friend or foe?_

_Love one another  
Live for each other  
So, are you friend or f__oe  
Cause I used to know_

_The meaning to  
our words of love  
Has disappeared_

* * *

_From previous chapter:_

_"I hear you're doing the Mating Dance this year", Plato began and plunged straight ahead, "I was wondering if you wanted to do the dance with me."_

_ "Sure, Plato", Victoria answered knowing that she had to accept someone's offer._

* * *

Victoria woke up to the bright sunlight streaming in from the window of Jelly's den. For the duration of their stay, Victoria, Misto and Jenny were staying at Jelly's place to make things easier. Unsurprisingly, Jelly's den was one of the tidiest places Victoria had ever lived in. She yawned and arched her back in a long stretch as she remembered that it was indeed the day of the Jellicle Ball.

* * *

Jemima rubbed the sleepiness from her eyes as Demeter shook her awake in excitement at the approach of the beginning of the Ball. The small calico sat up with a dazed expression and yawned, "It's too early."

"It's never too early on the day of the Jellicle Ball!" Demeter answered cheerfully although she was secretly worried about Macavity. Her little sister pouted and whimpered, "That's today?"

"Of course", Munkustrap answered in turn and smiled quickly at Demeter.

* * *

The ball began as it always did, with the beginning. The introduction went smoothly and Jemima was able to "give Victoria space" as Old Deuteronomy had put it. All was good for Jemima until Victoria's solo dance. She watched with her mouth slightly open and her eyes were opened wide in awe. She never knew that Victoria could dance so beautifully, but should of been obvious since her movements had always been graceful and precise. Victoria curled up and waited for her brother to come.

Cassandra had spotted Jemima watching the beautiful white queen and she sauntered over, still not forgetting what had happened the previous day. The Abyssinian wasn't a cruel Jellicle by nature but ever since she was young things seemed to disappear. Whenever she made a friend, the friend ended up moving or getting hurt. At first it was sort of a joke between her and Exotica. They joked around that if they didn't like someone they should have Cassandra hang out with that cat and soon he/she would end up leaving. But after Exotica had been hurt, Cassandra began to think it wasn't just a joke, it was a curse. So when she and Alonzo had become mates, she became overly protective, but Alonzo understood or so she thought.

"Watching your lover?" Cassandra teased Jemima in what she hoped sounded like a light playful manner. But the hatred and jealousy underneath the words weren't masked entirely. Jemima blushed again and began to mutter something unintelligible. The Abyssinian smirked and said, "There's nothing to be ashamed of."

Jemima crouched down low and finally the other Jellicle left.

* * *

Victoria noticed that Jemima was avoiding her at all costs. So far nothing too great had been stirred up and for that Victoria was grateful. The last thing she needed was for Jenny to be lecturing her again. Right then the music changed and a blasting sort of rock came on. Immediately, Etcetera, Jemima and Electra's heads turned in excitement. Just as she was about to ask who it was the answer came out himself.

A terribly handsome Maine Coon appeared with a low, "Meow."

Jemima began to act differently from that shy, reserved kitten that Victoria used to know. The Maine Coon (apparently named the Rum Tum Tugger) headed towards the calico and to the white queen's surprise, the two began to flirt. Jemima was obviously having a great time being in the handsome cat's attention. But her surprise began to fade as she soon found out that Tugger flirted with everyone, even the tom's, in one form or another.

Victoria couldn't help thinking that Jemima shouldn't be flirting with a tom so much older. Despite that, even Victoria found herself wanting the Rum Tum Tugger's attention so she understood why Jemima was so happy. As the song progressed and Tugger flirted even more with Jemima than the other kittens, Victoria felt jealous. Unlike the others who were also jealous, she wasn't jealous of Jemima, but Tugger.

Did Jemima still remember how much they had loved each other?

Then it hit Victoria. It was official. She was still in love with Jemima.

* * *

After Grizabella crashed at the Ball and Macavity wanted to crash too, things began to settle down, but Jemima was still nervous. The Mating Dance was so close and she hadn't decided who to go with. Old Deuteronomy was arriving and she spared herself from thinking too hard about the matter.

As Munkustrap was singing about how great Old Deuteronomy was, Plato had decided that Jemima was a great pillow. He pulled her closer to him and rolled around the ground. She knew he was flirting, but she didn't want to admit it. Besides, Plato had already asked Victoria for the Mating Dance and he would be doing the dance with her. It was special so there was no reason for him to be acting like this with her.

Macavity came and tried to scare the Jellicles again but failed to enter the Junkyard. Victoria ran out towards Old Deuteronomy and then he had Jemima dance with her. Munkustrap looked at Old Deuteronomy with confusion but didn't say anything. Then Alonzo came and began to flirt with the two of them as if Cassandra didn't exist.

* * *

Victoria watched Alonzo getting close to Jemima and the two of them seemed to share a private dance. She hissed with anger inside because she knew that Alonzo would end up hurting Jemima. After all with Cassandra on the loose knowing about their "secret" it wasn't safe.

* * *

The Mating Dance began and Jemima had found a partner by then. But as she lay with Tumblebrutus she watched Victoria dancing with Plato. Something inside her was boiling in heat and at first it seemed like frustration. It was jealousy and hurt.

Did Victoria remember how much they had loved each other?

Then it hit Jemima. It was official. She was still in love with Victoria.

* * *

When Macavity attacked the Junkyard and fought with Munkustrap, Victoria found herself keeping an eye on Jemima. Everyone except Jemima knew why Macavity hated Demeter and Jemima so much. Macavity had left the Junkyard years ago and at the time Demeter had loved him. He had asked her to leave with him but she refused since she wanted to take care of Jemima. Since then, Macavity had resented Demeter for not leaving with him and Jemima for being the reason why Demeter wouldn't go.

There was so much confusion that Victoria couldn't find Jemima for a second and she began to panic. There was something for her to protect. Her best friend. Her closest friend. Her...she wasn't sure what Jemima was exactly.

The Ball ended with her and Jemima saving Grizabella and everyone realizing how great the old queen really was. But that seemed to be hazy and unclear to Victoria. All she could remember was how Jemima had turned away from her and smiled cheerfully at Alonzo and Tumblebrutus. It had sent a jolt of pain straight to her heart and she recalled what her father had told her once.

_Love is the most beautiful pain that you can ever experience._

That was the only thing she could remember about her father, that he was a wise Jellicle.

* * *

Jemima entered her den still unaware of the visitor who sat outside her den every night, just waiting. The two glowing eyes closed for a second then a shadow like figure darted across the Junkyard into a neighboring den. The den was Cassandra's.

**A/N: I'm not trying to make Cassandra evil! Seriously. Okay, maybe a little bit.**

**Anyway, please review! Think of it this way, real authors get paid with money, and all us fanfiction authors get paid with are reviews! So if you read this, please review.**


	4. Malchik Gay

**A/N: Sorry, my internet wasn't letting me update this at all. Here's the next chapter, a few days late. It was longer than I had expected. This chapter elaborates a little bit on other characters, like Jenny and surprisingly, Tugger and Bomba make an appearance.**

**To my kind, lovely, super-duper reviewers: **

**To Alphoscapsy-cola: I know that Cassandra is always the evil one and I wanted to change that. Kind of a spoiler, but she's not as evil as she seems. Thanks for reviewing and the show continues!**

**To PSYchOtic-teNdencieS: *blushes* Thanks for your nice review! I hope you like this chapter, too!**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: I'm trying to convey the message that Victoria is the protector in the relationship. Thanks for reviewing! I hope you like this chapter!**

**Note: Some parts are based very, very (I stress very) loosely based on the song, "Malchik Gay", by tATu.  
**

_

* * *

I can't deny my feelings  
Growing strong  
I try to keep believing  
dreaming on  
And every time I see you  
I crave more  
I wanna pull you closer  
but you leave me feeling frozen._

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_Jemima entered her den still unaware of the visitor who sat outside her den every night, just waiting. The two glowing eyes__ closed for a second then a shadow like figure darted across the Junkyard into a neighboring den. The den was Cassandra's._

_

* * *

Running. Panting. Stopping._

_The alleys swirl around in a confusion. She is gone. __Panting.__ No one in sight. __Crying__. *drip* __Tears falling.__ Gone._

_Gone._

Jennyanydots woke up sweating desperately and choking on her tears.

* * *

Victoria paced around the Junkyard in the middle of the night. All Jellicles are born with the fear of the dark, but as they grow older their sight sharpens and darkness isn't as daunting. But Victoria had never been afraid of the darkness. Never. Since the day she was born the darkness was a hiding place and the unknown dangers lurking about didn't frighten her. There was nothing to be afraid of.

The only thing she was afraid of was losing the things she loved. Having to leave Jemima had been painful enough and now she was near her again but restrained. The only thing on Victoria's mind was Jemima and nothing else.

* * *

The next morning in the alleys, Bombalurina swished her tail back and forth in impatience waiting for the handsome Maine Coon. The Rum Tum Tugger was always late. There was no on time in his book and if he had arrived even one minute late, Bomba would have been surprised. After a few more minutes of waiting around, the red queen decided the handsome tom wasn't worth the time. As she began to leave Tugger rounded the corner and the two bumped into each other quite forcefully.

Tugger stepped back, shook his head, and said, "Sorry, I'm a little late."

"A little late?" Bomba nearly screeched in frustration. Tugger smirked and scoffed, "You're cute when you're angry."

"Cute is not a word to describe me", Bombalurina joked around. The Maine Coon looked at her and said, "You're right, how about this: You look absolutely ravishing."

The red queen glowed at his compliment and whispered, "When did your words become so sweet?"

"Listen, Bomba, I'd love to hang around, but..." Tugger trailed off guiltily and looked down at the ground awkwardly. Bombalurina was downcast but tried not to show it. She forced a strained smile and said, "Of course. Here's your comb."

"Thanks, Bomba", and with that the Maine Coon bid her farewell and left to join his lover. Bomba waited until he was out of sight until she let her troublesome tears drip down. Suddenly, she burst into a crying fit and whispered, "Why am I not enough?"

"Why not me?" she cried.

"Why won't you stay with me?"

"Why him?"

"Why Misto?"

* * *

In the distance the rumbling of thunder could be heard. Jemima yawned sleepily while Etcetera was bouncing around her excitedly. The hyper kitten jumped up and down to ask, "Is it true? That you're taken? Who? Who? Who is it?"

"No one", Jemima tried to push her friend away but it was futile. Etcetera was simply too strong for her. Etcetera frowned and finally sat down.

"What do mean?" Jemima rolled her eyes, pushed her friend away, and murmured, "I...I'm still single...and happy."

"I doubt that last part", Etcetera grumbled and the calico looked at her with a questioning look, "What?"

"Ever since that truth or dare game you've been acting really depressed."

Jemima licked her paw thinking about it. Was she really that depressed?

Etcetera waved a paw in front of her face and said, "Jemima, are you there?"

"Yeah", the calico kitten answered and whispered, "I...have to go see someone."

With that last sentence she left her den in a hurry leaving a disappointed Etcetera behind.

* * *

Just as it started to lightly rain, Jemima scurried into Jelly's den and found Jenny crying her eyes out. Beside her Misto and Jelly were hugging her tightly trying to console her. The black and white tuxedo tom looked at the calico and walked towards her. He hurried her outside the den and whispered, "Stomachache."

"Oh", Jemima wasn't sure what she was supposed to say. Misto scratched his head and pointed to the right, "Victoria is visiting Electra."

"...Thanks."

* * *

Electra was good company, Victoria decided, but there was something missing in the relationship. Electra could only ever be a distant friend and nothing closer. Jemima was truly the only one Victoria knew that made things right. Sure it had been awhile, but just the feeling of being close and the feeling of wanting to protect her, brought back memories.

As if on cue, Jemima scurried into Electra's den and squeaked, "Victoria, I have to…"

She saw Electra and was momentarily lost for words until Electra said, "Hey?"

"Hi", Jemima breathed and turned to Victoria, "I have to show you something."

"Okay", Victoria nodded wanting more than anything to spend sometime with her best friend. She turned to Electra and said, "Bye, catch you later."

"Bye Vic, bye Jem", Electra called back.

* * *

Inside the dark den, Jelly hushed Jenny and whispered, "Shhhh."

"Where's Jenisis?"

"She's gone on a short vacation", Jelly lied so easily this time it scared herself. Jenny had a few moments where her memory became unstable. Jelly was her friend after all and by now Jelly knew how to take care of the problems.

"What about Exotica?" Jenny whimpered softly. Jelly shushed her and said, "Just go to sleep, you're not feeling well."

* * *

Jemima pulled Victoria after her and said, "Almost there."

Then the two skidded to a stop as raindrops began to fall from the sky. Jemima looked up at the sky in awe and asked to no one in particular, "Where does the rain come from?"

"From the heavens", Victoria replied quickly and bowed her head down in embarrassment. It had been a quick decision and she had no idea why she had said that.

"Are they from the Everlasting Cat?" Jemima asked still watching the raindrops falling down rapidly. As a raindrop landed in Victoria's mouth, the white queen thought about it.

"I'd like to think that", Victoria answered, "The rain is so beautiful."

The calico pulled Victoria along with her until they came back to the place where they had seen their first thunder storm so long ago. Jemima turned around and smiled a small sad smile.

"Do you remember?" Jemima breathed quickly with her eyes open wide. Victoria looked around, momentarily lost in memories, and then smiled back. The white queen whispered, "How could I ever forget that time?"

For a second the two of them said nothing at all and listened to the rain pattering on the pavement. They both watched the drops of water plummeting down towards them in silence. Then Victoria looked down and asked, "Why can't things go back to the way they were?"

"What…what do you mean?" Jemima stuttered wondering what she was aiming at. Victoria turned towards her with a melancholy look and whispered, "We were so close."

"We can still be friends", Jemima offered wanting Victoria to be happier. The white queen shook her head sadly as raindrops dripped off her fur. She wanted to sob desperately but willed herself to be strong.

"Do you not even care anymore?" Victoria asked as her traitorous tears edged out of the corners of her eyes. She tossed her head and the tears flew away.

Caught by surprise, Jemima stuttered, "What?"

"You don't even seem to care", Victoria bit the inside of her mouth to stop herself from weeping.

"About what?" Jemima asked truly confused.

"About us!"

"What about us, Victoria?" Jemima whispered knowing that she was disobeying both Old Deuteronomy and Demeter.

"Jem", Victoria whispered in a hoarse tone as the rain thumped down upon both of them.

"I still love you."

**A/N: I'd like to think of that as a cliffhanger, but I'm not sure the suspense is that great. Anyway, please please please, please review! Not only do they make me happy, they also make the updating process faster. I actually know where this story is going, so please review!**


	5. All About Us

**A/N: Sorry, I haven't been updating anything lately. This is a longer chapter to make up for it.**

**To my cool, fantastic, mind-blowing reviewers:**

**To Alphoscapsy-cola: It's supposed to be unclear. But I think the mystery will be unraveled next chapter. Thanks for reviewing!**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Well, actually, the Tugger/Misto thing is kind of unknown to most Jellicles, but the majority are against homosexuals...sorry, just clarifying. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Note: Based on Loves Me Not and All About Us. Both belong to tATu.**

_

* * *

_

_When you are in Love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams. - Dr. Suess._

_The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it. - W. M. Lewis_

* * *

_From previous chapter:_

_"Jem", Victoria whispered in a hoarse tone as the rain thumped down upon both of them._

_"I still love you."_

* * *

"...", was all Jemima could say. She watched Victoria with a surprised and sorrowful look as the white queen watched her hopefully. The red, black and white calico cocked her head and asked, "What?"

Victoria noticed that the water dripping down Jemima's face had been tears all along, mixed with the rain. Victoria inhaled sharply and whispered, "I still love you, Jem."

"We were warned", Jemima lamely started trying to get her best friend (and maybe something more) to understand what she was getting at. The white queen stood absolutely still wondering if this was Jemima's way of saying, "No."

"This isn't allowed", she tried again but realized how it sounded and tried again, "I mean...what will happen?"

"What will happen if what?" Victoria asked confused by the mixed answer she was getting. Jemima inhaled deeply and exhaled quickly, "If we start our...love...again..."

She faltered and words failed her. Finally, Victoria had been able to keep her emotions inside and her face was a mask of indifference. Narrowing her eyes, Victoria used to be able to read Jemima like a book and now it wasn't any different. Jemima definitely still felt something but was reluctant because she cared about what other people thought.

"You do love me. Do you really care about what other people think that much?" Victoria asked coldly. The calico was shocked and recoiled slightly before whispering, "We can't."

That was enough of an answer for Victoria who turned away casually and turned around to leave. She left Jemima, sobbing weakly, behind and smiled slowly. Jemima hadn't contradicted her when she claimed that Jemima still loved her.

* * *

The Jellicle who waited outside Jemima's den every night could hear her muffled sobs from the inside. Obviously not wanting to be disturbed, Demeter had left her sister to weep. Ever since she was little, Jemima was prone to having breakdowns every so often. When a breakdown occurred, there was nothing to do but wait awhile. The Jellicle blinked carefully before stalking away.

* * *

Jemima couldn't believe what had happened in that single day. Victoria did still love her and now she knew that they both shared feelings. So why had she pushed her best friend away like that? It had hurt her so much, but Victoria had carefully masked any emotion and left.

_Flashback:_

_"I still love you, Jem."_

_End._

And earlier in the day Tumblebrutus had surprisingly confessed his feelings for her.

_Flashback:_

_"Um...I asked you to the Mating Dance because I really do care about you", Tumble stuttered slowly sounding a bit like Jemima. She nodded and said, "Are you trying to say you like me?"_

_"Yes", Tumblebrutus sighed, so relived that he didn't have to say anything more. Then he continued, "I was wondering, since next Ball or so you're becoming a queen, whether you would consider becoming mates with me."_

_"Um...I don't know", she confessed honestly. Tumble was a great tom and she would be lucky to have him. But Victoria was still on her mind at that time._

_End._

So confused and not knowing what to do in her current condition, Jemima got up reluctantly and left for her other best friend, the moon. Tumble had a notoriously low attention span and would probably be bored of her after a few weeks, and she certainly didn't want that. Victoria had acted so cold and she doubted whether the white queen was actually still in love.

Reaching the top of the T.S.E. 1 trunk, the calico looked at the moon as she had done during the Jellicle Ball and sang out all her emotions. If she didn't sing it, she would've burst.

**_He loves me, He loves me not_**

_Did Tumble really care?_

**_She loves me, She loves me not_**

_Did Victoria actually love her?_

**_He loves me, He loves me not  
She loves me..._**

Jemima's head twirled as she continued**.**

**_I started blurring the lines  
Because I didn't care  
I started crossing the line  
Cause you were never there_**

Not even noticing, Jemima had gone on to previous events that had led up to the very day.

**_No where to turn,  
No one to help,  
It's almost like I don't even know myself_**

Every word she sang was from her heart and the words flowed freely from her mouth.

**_Now I have to choose  
I don't know what to do  
He loves me, He loves me not  
She loves me, She loves me not  
He loves me, He loves me not  
She loves me, she loves me_**

Jemima looked down sadly and whispered, "She loves me."

"Hectic times, eh?" Tugger sat in the middle of the Junkyard. The two of them were alone in the night and she was suddenly afraid. Jemima murmured, "I guess."

"I know what you're going through", the Maine Coon attempted to start a heart to heart conversation. Jemima turned away shyly and said, "Do you?"

"I went through the same thing", Tugger said firmly and Jemima looked at him in disbelief. She whispered, "What do you mean?"

"Misto and I are...together", he said and suddenly chuckled. He shook his head once and said, "Even after being together I don't know what to call it."

"Oh", Jemima wasn't sure of what to say. Tugger continued, "I had to pick between him and Bomba. It hurt me so much to do that to Bomba, but I knew deep down that I could never love her as much as I love Misto."

The two sat in silence staring each other down before Jemima said, "So?"

"I got through it." Tugger tried to make his point clearer and mentally crossed out therapist on his list of future careers. The calico averted her eyes toward her paws and said, "What does this have to do with me?"

For a moment, Tugger was absolutely flabbergasted. Jemima was doing something so close to lying. His face fell and he thought, _What's changed you?_

Then the Maine Coon knew what was happening and turned to leave. Before disappearing he said loudly, "If you know what's good for you, you'll choose Tumblebrutus."

The calico gasped, surprised by how quickly he changed his tune and how he knew it was Tumble that she had been singing about.

* * *

Tugger closed his eyes knowing that the calico would be through a world of pain soon.

* * *

Jemima narrowed her eyes and scoffed lightly. She turned and ran towards Jelly's den at full speed.

* * *

Victoria lay down idly listening to her brother lecture her about staying out too late. Suddenly a Jellilce burst into the den and skidded to a halt. It was Jemima. The white queen cocked an eyebrow wondering why Jemima was in her den.

"Vicky, we've got to talk", Jemima said in a hurry.

"Be right back", Victoria told her brother and attempted to leave with the calico but Misto held her back for a second. She turned, momentarily surprised by the action. Then she saw her brother's eyes were dark and determined when he whispered stiffly, "You're making a mistake."

"No, I'm not", she insisted and left the den. Misto eyes darkened further and he turned to see Jenny standing near the back of the den. Jenny said, "Where did Victoria go?"

Her eyes were daring him to lie to her.

* * *

Jemima pulled Victoria after her to a more secluded place in the Junkyard. There she pulled Victoria tightly into a hug and said, "I do love you, Victoria."

"I don't want to be seperated from you, ever again", Jemima began to cry weakly. Victoria hugged her back and whispered, "It's okay."

Then Victoria kissed her gently on the top of her head and said, "I won't let anyone take you from me."

* * *

Misto licked his lips nervously and answered, "You heard everything, so why ask me?"

"I want you to tell me", Jenny answered simply and returned to her sewing.

"Victoria went out with a friend", Misto replied truthfully. Jenny busied herself and mockingly asked, "With who?"

"Jemima", Misto answered through gritted teeth. Then Jenny looked and said, "Okay, that's all I wanted to know."

Misto was amazed. He had almost been certain that the moment he said Jemima's name, Jenny would tell Old Deuteronomy about him and Tugger.

* * *

Jemima snuggled closer to Victoria and whispered, "How big is the sky?"

"It's bigger than the whole world", Victoria answered drowsily.

* * *

A few weeks passed before anything interesting happened. Admetus scratched his head thoughtfully and said to Tumble, "Did you notice that Jem and the white queen are never around?"

"Yeah", Tumble answered feeling dejected because Jemima had told him no.

"Where are they?" Plato asked and realized that he hadn't really paid much attention to Victoria after the Ball had ended. Cassandra sauntered up and whispered, "Probably having their own fun."

"What do you mean?" Electra asked as she and Etcetera walked in to talk. Etcetera's eyes gleamed knowing that there was probably gossip to be heard. Cassandra knew she shouldn't do it but she had to do it. She bent her head conspiratorially and began to spill.

* * *

When Jemima returned home, Demeter closed her eyes and readied herself to say the condemning words. Demeter blurted, "Jemima, we're both in slight danger. This means that we are both restricted from leaving our den without Munkustrap or Alonzo with us."

"What? Why?" Jemima cried. Demeter hugged her tightly and whispered, "Macavity."

"Alright then", Jemima answered knowing that it wasn't the truth.

* * *

Jemima managed to get away in the middle of the night and found Victoria waiting for her in the alleys. The white queen looked at her and asked, "Where have you been?"

"They won't let us see each other", Jemima started to cry again. Victoria patted her and said teasingly, "You cry too much."

"How can you joke around at a time like this?" Jemima asked.

"We knew that this was going to happen", Victoria answered, "Did they tell you that we couldn't see each other?"

"They said that I can't leave my den without Alonzo or Munkustrap with me", Jemima whispered. Victoria smiled and whispered, "That doesn't mean I can't visit you."

"I suppose", Jemima sniffed. Victoria patted her and started to sing.

_**They say, they don't trust.  
You, Me, We, Us.**_

Jemima turned to Victoria slightly surprised. The white queen was known for her dancing skills, but her voice wasn't too bad.

_**So, we'll fall if we must**_.  
_**Cause it's You, Me and it's all about  
It's all about...**_

Victoria's words failed and she whispered, "I made that up."

Surprisingly, Jemima continued with her own lyrics.

_**It's all about us.  
All about us.  
It's all about  
All about us.  
All about us.**_

_**There's a theme that they can't touch.  
Cause you know oh oh...**_

_**It's all about us.  
All about us.**_

_**We'll run away if we must  
Cause you know oh oh...**_

_**It's all about us.**_

Victoria smiled and sang.

_**If they hurt you, they hurt me too.  
So we'll rise up wont stop  
And it's all about  
It's all about...**_

_**It's all about us.**_

The two of them sat there grinning like idiots until a voice from the nearby rooftops called down to them.

"Nice song, but two pretty queens shouldn't be in the dark alleys all alone."

**A/N: Review please! Sorry this took so long. I hope that you are still reading. Not much to say.**


	6. Perfect Enemy

**A/N: Sorry for the wait. I'm currently traveling so it is a little hard to update. Anyway, here is the next chapter. It's a little short, I admit.**

**To my awesome, jaw-dropping, ravenous reviewers:**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Sorry for the cliffie, here is the next chapter. Thanks so much!**

**To PSYchOtiC-teNdencieS: I'm glad you like my story so much. Thanks for the kind words! I hope you like this chapter as well. Sorry for taking your song in the contest!!!!! I'm sure your video will be loads better though.**

**To mutinykitten: Thanks! I'm not sure what you mean about Misto/Tugger amount, is it too little...too much? Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**To mistofan101: Thanks so much for the reviews! They mean alot. I'm not sure what I should call you...animesonggirl, mistofan101 or MistoffeleesCyra!**

**Note: Based on the song, Perfect Enemy, but t.A.T.u.  
**

_

* * *

Tears are words the heart can't express. -Anonymous_

_Sometimes the memories are worth the pain. -Anonymous_

_We love with our heart and see with our eyes, but we cannot see love. Therefore it never seems real until you have lost it. - Anonymous._

_

* * *

_

_Keep yourself away,  
Far away from me.  
I forever stay  
Your PERFECT ENEMY._

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_The two of them sat there grinning like idiots until a voice from the nearby rooftops called down to them._

_"Nice song, but two pretty queens shouldn't be in the dark alleys all alone."_

* * *

"Who's there?" Victoria called out as boldly as she could while shielding Jemima from whatever harm might come. The voice shouted out again, "I'm a lonely Jellicle, just like you two."

The tom jumped down from the rooftops to reveal his identity, but Jemima wasn't too shocked to see that it was Alonzo. The black and white tom had a sad smile on his face as he whispered, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Jemima exclaimed in surprise, perplexed by his serious tone. Victoria in turn asked, "nd,What is there to be sorry for?"

A hint of suspiciousness could be heard in her voice but the second-in-command Jellicle set his mouth in a grim straight line and answered, "Sorry for what is about to happen."

"What is-", Victoria started to ask and then the dark alley brightened with blazing lights. The brightness came from every direction shining directly into Jemima and Victoria's eyes. It made them feel like criminals out of a novel or movie, except for the fact that it was reality which made it so much more frightening.

"Jemima, I told you not to wander around, look what's happened now!" Demeter cried out, standing on the nearby rooftops with all the Jellicles behind her and Munkustrap. Jemima began to shiver violently and hung onto Victoria desperately. THe white queen patted her friend's paw and said defiantly, "Just for two kitttens sneaking out for a little fun and the whole Jellicle tribe arrives to witness them being caught."

Munkustrap's face was so serious that it seemed to be a funeral and Victoria was afraid that it might actually turn out to be their funeral. The tabby snarled, "This is worse than just two kittens sneaking out. It's something against the Everlasting Cat and nature itself!"

"You mean we shouldn't be singing in the dark?" Victoria questioned feigning ignorance. Jelly snorted as Old Deuteronomy made his way towards the front of the crowd. He opened his arms and said, "You may be young but I know for a fact that neither of you is stupid. I told you both long ago that this sort of behavior isn't acceptable, but allow me to refresh your memory."

"No need", Jemima interrupted causing several gasps among the Jellicles. When had the small, calico turned so rude and brash? It was the white queen's fault, no doubt.

"I remember every word you said to me that day", Jemima stated flatly and continued, "Did you really think that pathetic excuse was enough to stop true love?"

Her passionate voice rang through the alley and echoed back eerily. Then without hesitation she began to sing, making up the words as she went along.

_**Why should I welcome your domination?  
Why should I listen to explanations?**_

Old Deuteronomy's usually happy face fell into a deep frown as he heard her words. This was beyond rude and insulting.

_**I'm not pretending to make it simple.  
Try to be something experimental.**_

It seemed that her prior courage was failing and once again she was Jemima, the shy, docile and scared kitten. Victoria joined in with her own lyrics.

_**You don't turn me off I will never fail.  
Things I love before are now for sale.**_

Very few of the Jellicles could understand what Victoria was singing about, but Electra caught on. It meant that things she valued before didn't seem so important anymore because of Jemima and that no one would be able to stop her unless they killed both of them.

_**Keep yourself away,  
Far away from me.  
I forever stay  
Your perfect enemy.**_

Basically a declaration of war, Munkustrap thought bitterly. Victoria's voice was haunting and ethereal.

Tumblebrutus gaped, half-understanding why Jemima had rejected him. Jemima and Victoria sang the last lines over again.

Demeter looked at her sister with disbelieving eyes and ears. Victoria truly had changed Jemima and not in a good way.

They stopped singing and the Jellicles leapt down from the rooftops, one by one. Jenny called out, "Victoria, stop this nonsense and come back to the Junkyard."

"Why are you against this, Aunt Jenny?" Victoria whispered so that only Jenny, Jemima and her could hear. Her aunt froze for a second and whispered back, "The two of you come back to the Junkyard and I'll tell you why."

"Why not tell us now?" Victoria hissed angrily. She was through with playing these games.

"Because this isn't a good place to tell it", Jenny sighed, "I swear on the Everlasting Cat that I will tell you the honest truth if you come back to the Junkyard."

An oath on the Everlasting Cat was the deepest one a Jellicle could make and so Victoria decided it was worth it. Jemima and Victoria trailed back to the Junkyard while others watched them suspiciously.

* * *

Jenny had Victoria and Jemima settle in Jelly's den and began to tell the story. Jelly at first had been nervous and asked if it was wise, but Jenny had shushed her.

"I had a sister and her name was Jenisis. An interesting fact is that my parents had wanted to name her Jenesis meaning beginning, but they had spelled it wrong. So it seemed that her name wouldn't have a meaning. Anyway, she was young and foolish like you two. Eventually she thought she was in love with another queen. The two of them began to have a relationship and everyone knew about it. We tried to stop the two of them, but they were misguided. One day, an alley cat who was a devote follower of the Everlasting Cat attacked them both. Jenisis...was killed."

Jenny's voice broke momentarily and then she continued after a big gulp of air. "The other queen was badly injured, but survived."

"This is the reason why I am so opposed to the two of you having a relationship and now I hope you will understand how wrong and dangerous it is!" Jenny ended up screaming and then whispered, "I just want both of you to be safe, that's all."

For a moment the den was silent. Then Victoria whispered, "I'm sorry, Aunt Jenny, I know you mean well, but...I'd rather be dead than without Jemima."

Jemima's eyes widened and she whispered, "Really?"

"Yes. Always and forever."

"Did you not learn anything?" Jenny exclaimed in disbelief. Jemima answered, "We learned that love is worth dying for."

The two of them got up to leave and just before exiting the den, Jemima turned aroud slightly and asked, "Who was the queen Jenisis fell in love with?"

"Exotica", Jenny whispered. Jemima smiled and said, "I thought so, she waits outside my den singing a lullaby each night for me. I didn't know who it was until you told me the story. I can tell by her songs that she approves of our relationship. She doesn't regret it."

"But you will regret it. Both of you!" Jenny cried.

"I love you too, Aunt Jenny", Victoria said. Then as the two exited Old Deuteronomy, Munkustrap and Alonzo were waiting for them outside. Munkustrap said, "Tomorrow morning, Victoria will be leaving the Junkyard for some fresh air."

"What?!?!?!"

**A/N: End of my short chapter. I don't know when this story will end, but there is a chance that the next chapter may be the last. Sorry for the short notice. I'll think about it. Just remember that I have a knack for actually killing some of the characters. *wink* *wink***

**Please review! And finally the story of Jenisis is explained.  
**


	7. Not Gonna Get Us

**A/N: I said last chapter that this might be the last chapter. (Oh wow, way to screw up a sentence, right?) So indeed, this might be the last chapter. More information at the bottom.  
**

**To my unbelievably entertaining reviewers:**

**To mutinykitten: So kind! I might continue, but I also might not. Sorry for the Misto/Tugger parts, but they had to be in here.  
**

**To em0XprYncez: I hope you mean that in a positive way. :) Thanks anyway!**

**To Tuggers'Lil'Princess: I think he should leave too. I'm mad at Tugger and Misto too! Lol. Thanks for reviewing!  
**

**Note: Based on the song, Not Gonna Get Us, by t.A.T.u. (Big surprise...huh?)****  
**

_

* * *

Friendship is the marriage of the soul__. -Voltaire._

_When you left, I lost a part of me.__ -Anonymous_

_The greatest harm can result from the best intentions.__ - Stone of Tears._

_You have to have a darkness...for the dawn to come. - Anonymous._

_You cannot be a good writer of serious fiction if you are not depressed. - Anonymous. _(I just had to put this one here. Now I'm not sure I want this to be a good piece of serious fanfiction...)

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_Then as the two exited Old Deuteronomy, Munkustrap and Alonzo were waiting for them outside. Munkustrap said, "Tomorrow morning, Victoria will be leaving the Junkyard for some fresh air."_

_"What?!?!?!"_

* * *

"You both need some times to think this out clearly", Old Deuteronomy stressed for what seemed to be the hundredth time to them. By his side, Munkustrap stood tall and intimidating and Victoria was sure that he would drag her out of the Junkyard if need be. Jemima seemed quite frozen behind her and Victoria felt a pang of concern for her lover.

"It would be best for you to go quietly", Alonzo whispered, surprising the rest of them. He rarely spoke with such a hesitant tone. Then he raised his head and stared at Victoria directly trying to convey some hidden message. But the white queen couldn't understand and shook her head in confusion. The black and white tom said normally, "Come, Victoria, I shall escort you to an empty den."

This time his voice held such authority that one would have thought he was the Jellicle Leader. Victoria looked back at Jemima and said, "It's alright."

"Goodnight, Vicky", Jemima whispered and they hugged tightly before Alonzo practically pulled her off.

* * *

After Old Deuteronomy and Munkustrap were out of sight, Alonzo started talking to Victoria freely. The black and white tom had never been so talkative in his life.

"For once, I feel conflicted over my duties and beliefs. The moment I heard your voices in the alleys, singing about how you would always be together, I knew. I knew that I approved of your relationship. I'm so sorry that I couldn't do anything to stop them", and he finally paused for breath. Taking advantage of the moment, Victoria hushed him and whispered, "Thank you, Alonzo. You don't know how much it means for me to hear this from a fellow Jellicle. It seems that most of the Jellicles don't like who and apparently 'what' we are."

"I have a sort of plan", Alonzo said cautiously, "You will have to leave the Junkyard temporarily. During this time, I will try to make the Jellicles see clearly."

"It will never work", the white queen stated adamantly. The tom paused and hissed, "But it's your only hope!"

"Fine, I will leave the Junkyard for 3 days, no more than that. If by that time you haven't come up with something, I will take control of the situation", Victoria answered without a trace of fear. Alonzo smiled and said, "I think I'm falling in love with your attitude and bravery."

"Wonderful", Victoria said with a sad smile gracing her lips, "I could love you, Alonzo, but I would always love Jemima more."

"I know", he said and told her, "Three days will surely be enough and if not, I will help you with whatever plan you carry out."

"Do you promise?" Her voice was suddenly low.

"I promise. I swear on the Everlasting Cat", he smirked.

"Good."

* * *

The next morning, Victoria wasn't allowed to talk to Jemima and so she sent her a look that conveyed the message, "_I have a plan, but I'm going to be gone for awhile._"

Jemima willed herself to be strong. She was so sick of being the one who would be useless and cry over insignificant details. _Victoria leaving isn't insignificant!_ She fought her thoughts back and breathed deeply. Demeter put an arm around her sister and pulled her into a warm embrace. It felt traitorous, to hug someone who opposed her very being, but it was her sister and so she tried not to act odd.

That whole day, everyone seemed to avoid her. Her friends avoided her like the plague and the only company she had was Munkustrap, who would stop and glare at her every two seconds of the day. It was unbearable to be treated like this, but soon Electra stepped forward and hugged Jemima. The young tabby whispered, "I couldn't care less about who is your mate, as long as you are happy."

"Thanks, Electra", Jemima answered, a little surprised, since Electra had always been sort of judgemental. Her friend said, "Etcetera is taking this hard. She thinks of this as a betrayal and something disgusting."

"How have I betrayed her?" Jemima asked in astonishment. Electra leaned in and hissed, "You never told any of us what had happened."

"How did you all find out?"

Electra looked around to make sure no one was watching or listening. Then she breathed, "Cassandra."

"...", Jemima sighed heavily.

* * *

Jemima approached Cassandra's den with hesitant steps and as she was getting closer and closer, the more her brain urged her body to turn around and run. Finally Jemima shook her head and screamed, "I'm not a coward!"

Her voice echoed through the Junkyard and suddenly Cassandra hurried out with Exotica to see what was the big racket. When Cassandra saw the small calico, she paled noticably.

"Cassandra, what have I ever done to you?" Jemima was shouting as loud as she could. The Abyssinian made no attempt to silence or muffle her voice. Exotica watched the scene unfolding in front of her. Cassandra inhaled sharply and said, "Nothing."

"Then why?" Calming down, the calico used her regular soft voice to talk. "Why did you tell everyone about us?"

"I had to", and her voice did sound desperate. Suddenly Exotica tackled Jemima, sending her sprawling to the ground. The dark queen whispered in her sad voice, "Listen and listen well."

"Old Deuteronomy threatened to have me banished from the Junkyard forever unless she told everyone. In order to protect me, Cassandra did as she was told. Now that you've heard the story, do you understand?"

"No! I don't understand", Jemima pleaded with Exotica, "Why does everyone hate us?"

"They don't hate us." A simple answer coming from a queen who had lost nearly everything. Jemima looked at the dark queen in disbelief, "What?"

"They fear what we represent", Exotica sighed as Jemima sat down and whispered, "What do we represent?"

"We represent something that is totally against everything they believe in."

"So?" Jemima wanted to understand why most of her friends would turn their backs on her like this. Exotica patted her while Cassandra answered, "Simply because fear can drive us to doing the worst things."

"I'm sorry, Jemima", Cassandra apologized and bowed her head. The calico shook her head and whispered, "I guess it isn't your fault. I should be mad at Old Deuteronomy, not you."

"Alonzo told me that he has a plan with Victoria and that in two more days, she should be returning." Cassandra said, even though Alonzo had warned her that the outcome wasn't for sure.

"Really?" A nod from Cassandra was her confirmation. Jemima sighed, "Then I'll wait that long."

* * *

Those waiting days passed faster than Jemima had imagined they would. It was dull without Victoria, but suffering through two or three days was alright compared to being alone her whole life.

Alonzo walked out from Old Deuteronomy's den with a weary complexion as he remembered his arguments. Old Deuteronomy had basically pushed him away and brushed off all his words and diplomacy had been so hard to maintain. Victoria had been right, it had been no use.

The black and white tom walked towards Jemima and whispered, "I failed. I'm sorry."

Jemima showed no emotion and suddenly she sighed, "I know."

* * *

That night Victoria snuck out of her confinement area and got into the Junkyard. She had heard how Alonzo had failed even though his arguments were sound. Finding the right den, the white queen broke inside.

"Jemima", she gently hissed at her sleeping lover's body. Jemima jerked awake and saw Victoria.

"Victoria", she sighed, "You came back."

"Of course, hurry, we're leaving", the white queen pushed Jemima out of the den and into the middle of the Junkyard. The calico, still not fully alert, stumbled a bit and murmured, "What do you mean?"

"We're running away", Victoria answered while dragging her along. For once, Victoria was grateful that Jemima was small enough to move around. Jemima whispered, "What? Where?"

"A place where they won't find us and we can do whatever we want", Victoria muttered still dragging her away. They made it out of the Junkyard so quietly that no one stopped them and Victoria was half-surprised. She had almost expected Munkustrap or Jelly to jump out of the shadows and nab them.

Through the rest of the night Victoria led Jemima towards the alleys away from their beloved Junkyard. Tears splashed down both their faces as they fled from home.

* * *

It was so bright the next morning, Victoria woke up and realized that they had fallen asleep and Jemima was leaning against her still dozing gently. The birds nearby were chirping as if greeting them with a good morning.

"Jemima, wake up", Victoria whispered. When that didn't work, she started singing. They seemed to have sang alot ever since seeing each other again.

**Not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us**

Jemima woke up startled by the voice and watched Victoria dance and sing.

**Starting from here, let's make a promise  
You and me, let's just be honest  
We're gonna run, nothing can stop us  
Even the night that falls all around us**

Jemima started to smile as she listened to the words. Victoria always had a positive attitude.

**Soon there will be laughter and voices  
Beyond the clouds over the mountains  
We'll run away on roads that are empty  
Lights from the airfield shining upon you**

This time, Jemima joined in for what she thought to be the chorus lines.

**Nothing can stop us, not now, I love you  
They're not gonna get us,  
They're not gonna get us**

Jemima made up the next lines, since she was sure Victoria had made up the previous lines.

**  
We'll run away, keep everything simple  
Night will come down, our guardian angel  
We rush ahead, the crossroads are empty  
Our spirits rise, they're not gonna get us**

**My love for you, always forever  
Just you and me, all else is nothing  
Not going back, not going back there  
They don't understand,  
They don't understand us!**

"I'm not afraid anymore, Victoria", Jemima said and smiled. The two of them grinned at each other until it was time to set off. They were leaving everything behind them.

* * *

At about noon time Jemima rolled to the ground and groaned, "I'm so hungry."

"I know, Jemima", Victoria answered and then sighed, "Fine, we'll forage for food."

"Yes!"

* * *

After a not-quite-satisfying meal, the two set off again and this time, Victoria had a faint idea of where they were going. The two walked for 2 more days before Victoria knew that they had arrived somewhere safe. It was the entrance to a yard.

They entered the abandoned yard and felt truly safe and happy although alone. This was a place where they could settle. It was safe.

Jemima raised her arms towards the sky and they both felt free. Truly free for the first time ever. But the best part was that they were together.

**A/N: So I think this is a good ending...but then again I have ideas for a further story too. So...I'm conflicted.**

**Please review and if you want more of this story, just say so. Keep in mind that I do end up with sad, depressing endings. If I continue this story there will be at least one death and lots of angst. Anyway, thanks for reading!  
**


	8. 30 Minutes

**A/N: So I call this Part 2 a.k.a. Optional Part. This is optional part (I just repeated myself), so if you like the happy ending I set last chapter, you can pretend that's the ending. For the people who wanted more to the story, here it is. I've planned it all out and the only thing I'll say as a spoiler is this: It's different from what I originally planned, and a bit more depressing.**

**To my amazing reviewers: **

**To em0XprYncez: Thanks so much. *blushes***

**To mutinykitten: Oh, don't miss your bus! Thanks for reading. You're so nice.**

**To Alphoscapsy-cola: It is sort of tragic. I hope you like the rest of the story. Thanks for reviewing!**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: It's not really a sequel, sort of an alternate ending.**

**To Jemidancer2011: Thanks for the compliment. I hope you like this continuage. **

**Note: Loosely based on 30 minutes and Running Blind.  
**

* * *

It was a new life for both Jemima and Victoria. For once, they were all alone. For once they had to find their own food. For once they had to start from scratch. For once no one would care about what they did. In a way, it was scary, horrifying and frightening, but it was also strangely, exciting.

Victoria caught three mice wandering around the Safeyard, as Jemima called it. That was their first meal in a new world. The Safeyard was as big as the Junkyard but cleaner by far and the place had a sort of calming aura. Jemima thought it was a relatively nice place and would have been content to stay there.

Later as Victoria had gone out to hunt for food, Jemima wandered about the Safeyard checking out new areas and such. As she was searching she heard, "Pssst!"

"Who's there?" Jemima asked in alarm. The sound came again and she followed it until she reached a crack in the fence around the Safeyard. Through the hole she saw Plato and was very surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you, Jemima", Plato whispered with a cheeky grin on his face. If Jemima hadn't been so alarmed, she would have rolled her eyes. However, they had been discovered, surely it was over for them now.

"Jemima, Demeter sent me to get you back", Plato whispered now with a more solemn look on his face, "She misses you so much."

"I'm not coming back", Jemima stated carefully as if choosing her words with caution. Plato looked at her strangely, "If you return to the Junkyard, it would be better for everyone."

"How?" Jemima asked in disbelief. There was no way some funky-eyebrowed tom was going to trick her. The said tom bent lower and whispered, "Do you realize what you're doing? You're ruining Victoria's life."

"What are you talking about?" The tiny calico yelped at his harsh words. Plato whispered, "We both know that her spirit is like a bird's. She wants to fly in the skies swooping on her prey. Victoria is an independent queen and you're going to make her unhappy."

"I don't believe you", Jemima pouted like a young kitten, which she sort of was. Then the tom looked at her sadly and asked, "Why do you love Victoria?"

The calico looked at Plato as if he was an alien. Then she said, "Why do you want to know?"

"To see how much you care about her."

"I love her because she's strong. I love her for not being afraid to love. I love her because she'd protect me. I love her because only she understands what I talk about. I love her and she loves me."

Jemima took a huge breath. Plato was quite impressed with her speech. Then he bent lower towards her and hissed, "Then you must know her well. Tell me, do you think she could be happy with this life? Always in fear and isolation?"

Letting his words sink in he continued, "If you come back I promise no one will hunt for Victoria or hurt her."

After a moment of silence as treacherous tears slipped down Jemima's face, Plato drove his words home, "Hiding away like this isn't even a life you could live with much less Victoria."

"You promise no one will go after her?" Jemima asked cracking terribly. _Drip. Drip. Drip._

"I promise", Plato said, "If you need time, I'll come back in half an hour to ask you your final decision."

"I need the time", Jemima whispered.

* * *

Pacing around the Safeyard, Jemima was so terribly confused. She started singing quietly to herself.

**Out of sight, out of mind  
Out of time to decide  
Do we run? Should I hide  
For the rest of my life?**

Those troublesome tears were coming again. She hated crying with a passion, but it wouldn't leave her alone.

**30 minutes, the blink of the night  
30 minutes to alter our lifes**

It was so little time to really think about it. Jemima definitely couldn't tell Victoria about this.

**30 minutes to make up my mind  
30 minutes to finally decide  
30 minutes to whisper your name  
30 minutes to shelter the blame  
30 minutes of bliss, 30 lies  
30 minutes to finally decide**

Victoria would be better off without her, Jemima thought.

**Can we fly do I stay  
We could lose, we could fail  
Either way, options change  
Chances fail, trains derail.**

**30 minutes, the blink of the night  
30 minutes to all of our lifes  
30 minutes to make up my mind  
30 minutes to finally decide  
30 minutes to whisper your name  
30 minutes to show her the blame  
30 minutes of bliss, 30 lies  
30 minutes to finally decide**

"To decide", Jemima whispered, having finally made up her mind. She had to do this.

* * *

Victoria arrived back at the Safeyard after a lengthy trip of foraging. After being out for at least 3 hours, she called out, "Jemima, I'm back!"

Silence.

"Jemima?"

Still nothing.

"Stop playing around."

.....

Nothing.

"Jemima?!?!?" Panic finally set in and Victoria went around the Safeyard looking for Jemima. At a small crook she found a note. It went:

_Victoria, I'm not sorry for doing this. I've thought about it and now I know that you weren't suited for this life. You deserve to be free and I'm dragging you down. I'm going back to the Junkyard with Plato. He came to help me back. It's the best thing to do. Please don't follow, we'll only suffer. Plato has promised that no one will bother you anymore._

_Always yours,  
Jemima._

The pure white queen was astonished by the words. She couldn't believe it. Searching the scrap of paper for the three most important words, her eyes scanned. The words weren't there.

The words Jemima had forgotten were: _I love you._

* * *

Victoria ran in the darkness down the alleys and away from the Safeyard. Branches got in her way, but she tore right through them leaving deep gashes in her shoulder and chest. That didn't matter though. The most important thing was that Jemima was gone and she had gone _willingly._ It ripped her heart open with betrayal and anguish. Then reaching a dead end of an alleyway, she howled with sadness.

**Reaching for you  
I know you're out there somewhere  
It's too dark, and so cold  
I know I had to come here**

Panting for breath, Victoria kept on singing to distract herself from the aching pain in her chest.

**Every broken dream  
That I leave behind  
Keeps me going on  
Keeps me running blind**

**Calling your name, I hear only air  
And searching through it I see only shadows  
You've got to show me your face  
Voices, I hear them calling behind me  
Phantoms, so few, are burning inside me  
You've got to give me a sign**

Waiting for a moment, wandering if Jemima could hear, Victoria stood expectantly.

**Fading, slowly,  
You're drifting into darkness  
I can't see, I can't think  
I need to keep on searching**

**Every memory,  
Every thought of you  
Is inside of me,  
Tells me what to do**

_Go back and turn right._ A whisper seemed to carry on the wind. The white queen was instantly alert. She turned around searching for more. _Straight ahead to the end._

"Jemima?" Victoria called half expecting an answer.

Silence.

"Please, Jemima!"

Nothing.

"JEMIMA!"

...

"I'll always love you", this time in a whisper.

It might have been her imagination but she thought she heard Jemima's voice say, "_I know_."

**A/N: So first chapter of Part 2, how is it? Please review! I love reviews. Thanks people!**


	9. Gomenasai

**A/N: I just noticed that I forgot to put quotes at the beginning of last chapter...oh well. Here is the next chapter in this incredibly cliche story.**

**To my faithful, courageous, probably-wondering-why-I-do-this, reviewers:**

**To mutinykitten: Are the lyric off? Oh well, it still fits the tory. :D Thanks!**

**To Jemidancer2011: Thanks, sad is always good, right? Just brace yourself for more sad! Thanks again!**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Thanks for reviewing! The twist is just to get them back to the Junkyard, so sorry...it's not that interesting.**

**To em0XprYncez: What are your other reasons? Anyway thanks for reviewing!**

**To Alphoscapsy-cola: Winds like to whisper, that's all. ;) Thanks for reviewing!**

**Note: Loosely based on We Shout and Gomenasai, by (do I have to type it?) t.A.T.u.**

_

* * *

_

_A moment of time may make us unhappy forever. - John Gay._

_Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. - Anonymous_

_Better by far you should forget and smile than that you should remember and be sad. - Anonymous_

_Behind my smile is everything you'll never understand. - Anonymous_

_

* * *

_

_I will forget my dreams  
Nothing is what it seems_

_You traded in your wings  
For everything freedom brings_

_Everything that you feel  
Is everything that I feel  
So when we dream  
We shout..._

_

* * *

_

_From previous chapter:_

_"I'll always love you", this time in a whisper._

_It might have been her imagination but she thought she heard Jemima's voice say, "__I know."_

* * *

Victoria reached the Junkyard entrance finally wondering about what to say. It was for sure that the Jellicles didn't want her back, so why should she try? Well, it was worth a try just to see how angry the Jellicles were and if they wouldn't let her in, she could always tease the guard.

"Hello?" Despite having ran for quite a long distance, Victoria managed to make her voice sound strong albeit a little strained. She waited only a minute or two before an answer came.

"Good morning, Victoria", a voice came from the inside of the Junkyard.

* * *

Jemima lay down, completely miserable, but still trying to cheer herself up. No matter how hard she tried to convince herself that leaving the Safeyard had been for Victoria, she couldn't help the nagging thought that something was wrong. After returning to the Junkyard, she found things quite different from expected. What she expected was that the Jellicles would shun her and think of her as a leper or something. What she got was a warm re-welcome and comforting all around. Everyone seemed to except that whatever had happened previously was all Victoria's fault and her's alone.

The guilt and agony seemed to drag Jemima down into a deep depression.

* * *

"Admetus?"

"Why'd it have to be Jem?" Admetus asked in curiousity. He stepped out into the alleyways and looked at the sun. "If it had been anyone else, I think we all would've forgiven you."

"What do you mean?" Victoria replied with a question. The tom stepped forward and rubbed his forehead against his paw, "Man it's hot out."

The white queen waited for him to continue.

"Everyone's got a soft spot for Jemima. We can forgive her foolishness, but we can't forgive your cold-heartedness. You took one of our dearest away from us. That's not something a true Jellicle would do", Admetus grumbled on. Victoria laughed once and doubled over.

Admetus raised one eyebrow and watched the white queen laugh, "What's so funny?"

"You said it so seriously, it's almost like you believed it!" Victoria laughed still not fully recovered. Then she immediately pulled a more solemn face and whispered, "A true Jellicle would accept another Jellicle not matter what."

"Victoria, you don't seem to understand my point. What I'm trying to say is that you have done-"

"No, Admetus, you don't seem to understand my point." Victoria sighed, "I'll be leaving now."

"Wait!"

Too late, she had already gone.

* * *

Alonzo arrived at Jemima's den and hissed, "Jemima?"

"Yeah", was the quiet answer he got. The black and white tom ducked in and said, "Admetus saw Victoria at the Junkyard entrance. He apparently made it clear that she couldn't come in and so she left. But there's information that she's nearby."

"Thanks, Alonzo. No hurry....but you...should be leaving", Jemima managed finally. She was so excited that she couldn't sit still.

Jemima was quite clever for a young kitten, so naturally her brain churned with ideas of plans to meet Victoria. It was still early and she had a perfect idea.

* * *

"Deme?"

"What is it?" Demeter called back to her sister. Jemima appeared and looking as innocent as possible she asked, "Can I sleep over at Electra's tonight?"

"Hmm...I don't know", her older sister pondered for a moment and Jemima jumped, "I never have fun anymore! It isn't fair, please?"

"Fine, but make sure Electra's okay with it", Demeter gave in to Jemima's "puppy face".

As Demeter went off to find Munkustrap, Jemima silently cheered and hissed, "Phase 1, complete!"

* * *

Jemimahad set up everything in Electra's den and whispered, "Thanks for helping me. You really are a great friend."

"Anything for you", Electra joked and then seriously, "Are you sure this is going to work?"

"No", the calico admitted reluctantly while shifting some tires near the wall of the Junkyard, "But that's what makes it so exciting."

"If they catch you trying to sneak out again, you know they're not going to forgive you, right?" Electra insisted. Jemima sighed heavily and said, "Are you trying to convince me not to do it?"

"Maybe", Electra whispered, "I just don't want to watch you guys get hurt again."

"I'm already hurting inside", Jemima sighed again, "Help me move these tires a little higher."

"What are they for?" Electra asked watching her shift a heavy tire to the right. Jemima looked down and said, "Phase 2, complete."

"But what are they for?" Electra called after Jemima as she ran back to the den.

No answer came.

When they were back in the den, Jemima called, "Pass me some newspapers."

"Here", Electra handed them to her. Sure, Jemima was acting a little odd, but one could tell she was dead serious about the plan. Jemima tied the newspapers together with string to make a makeshift rope long enough to work.

The calico grinned, "Phase 3, complete."

* * *

"I hope you make it", Electra whispered. The calico nodded and answered, "You've been a true friend, thanks for everything."

Jemima left and went out to complete her plan. She ran past Alonzo, who pretended not to see her, and to the Junkyard walls. Phase 2 of the plan had been stacking the tires up high so that she could climb up onto them and over the wall. Jemima hurried up the stacked tires and thought aloud, "It really worked."

Jumping onto the wall Jemima took her rope newspaper and tied it to the top of the Junkyard wall, then let it hang down to the ground. Jemima was careful at this part and slowly shimmied down the rope.

Now she was outside the Junkyard, but with no way back in. She tugged at the rope newspaper at an odd angle and it came coiling down with the shingle it had been holding onto. Jemima hid the rope and ran towards the entrance of the Junkyard.

* * *

Victoria lay down by the entrance wondering if they would be letting her in any time soon. She heard rustling and then, "Victoria!"

Recognizing the voice immediately, Victoria ran towards Jemima and hugged her tight. The two were bound together by some invisible force and it wasn't until the small calico began to cry, that they broke apart.

"I'm sorry, Victoria! I thought it would be better for both of us", Jemima cried as silently as she could. The white queen dragged her along to a farther place in the alleys hoping to muffle the sounds of her cries and their exchange of words.

"Why did you run away?" Victoria asked, still not understand. Jemima whispered, "I was convinced...I can't believe I was so stupid!"

"Jemima?"

**What I thought wasn't mine  
In the light  
Was a one of a kind,  
A precious pearl**

Victoria smiled at the words. Jemima's voice rang through the alleys again. She was saying that she didn't think Victoria was her's and that the white queen was the only one she could ever love that much.

**When I wanted to cry  
I couldn't cause I  
Wasn't allowed**

**Gomenasai for everything  
Gomenasai, I know I let you down  
Gomenasai till the end  
I never needed a friend  
Like I do now**

**What I thought wasn't all  
So innocent  
Was a delicate doll  
Of porcelain**

**When I wanted to call you  
And ask you for help  
I stopped myself**

Tears ran down the calico's cheeks and she continued looking Victoria straight into the eyes.

**Gomenasai, for everything  
Gomenasai, Gomenasai, Gomenasai  
I never needed a friend,  
Like I do now**

**Gomenasai, I let you down  
Gomenasai, Gomenasai,  
Gomenasai till the end  
I never needed a friend  
Like I do now**

Jemima watched Victoria with sad eyes.

"I forgive you, Jemima", Victoria whispered with a slight smile on her face, "Just promise me to never run away like that ever again. I told you that I want to be with you forever, even if I have to die to gain that."

"Thanks", the calico whispered, "I promise."

"This is really interesting and all, but you're kind of in my property", a sarcastic mocking voice called to them. It was sort of a deja vu, except the voice definitely did not belong to Alonzo or any other Jellicle they knew.

**Gomenasai means I'm so sorry in Japanese in case you don't know. Thanks for all the reviews. Please review again! I'm sorry it seems kind of repetitive, but soon it will be different, I promise. Reviews!**


	10. Clowns

**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter and long wait. I will try to update soon!**

**To my reviewers (didn't have time):**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: Thanks for reviewing! Hope you enjoy the chapter!**

**To Jemidancer2011: Thanks for reviewing! Lyrics just work well.**

**To em0XprYncez: Thanks for reviewing!**

**To jellicle-artist: Thanks for reviewing! A few people who don't like slash seem to like this story. Welcome aboard!**

**Note: Loosely based on Sacrifice and Clowns, by t.A.T.u.**

_

* * *

Dying is easy. Being a lesbian is hard. - Mary Pat Hooligan._

_I wanna believe in tomorrow. - SCANDAL._

_Where there's a will there's a way. - Anonymous._

* * *

_I will sacrifice  
I will sacrifice  
All I have in life  
To clear my conscience_

I will sacrifice  
I will sacrifice  
All I have in life  
Sacrifice, sacrifice

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_"This is really interesting and all, but you're kind of in my property", a sarcastic mocking voice called to them. It was sort of a deja vu, except the voice definitely did not belong to Alonzo or any other Jellicle they knew._

* * *

Victoria looked to the rooftops and saw an unfamiliar tom sitting watching them with an impassive expression. Jemima gasped lightly and stuttered, "Sorry for intruding, I didn't know this was yours."

"That's fine", the tom drawled lightly, "I'm Kave."

"Um…I'm Jemima and this is Victoria", Jemima said hesitantly. Victoria narrowed her eyes at the alleycat, ready to pounce if he posed even the smallest of threats.

"I'm not going to hurt you guys", Kave trailed off and looked at Victoria purposefully.

"You can say whatever you want, but that doesn't mean I'm going to believe you", Victoria looked away hoping she seemed like a high-class snob.

"It's really none of my business", the tom looked about lazily, "But what were you singing about?"

"Well, it's a long story", Jemima ventured to be friendly with the rough looking alleycat.

"And I've got a lot of time", Kave scowled. The calico gulped and started, "Well it's compli-"

"You don't have to say anything", Victoria started to lead Jemima away. Kave sighed heavily and called to them, "I think I get the gist of it. Do you need help?"

"Why would you want to help us?" Victoria didn't even turn around to face him.

"I'll always help others when they need it", the tom said expectantly.

"How can you help us?" Victoria hissed, "Not like we need it or anything."

Kave snorted lightly and said, "I can give you a piece of advice."

"That will really help", Victoria rolled her eyes. Kave nodded, "Maybe it will help."

"And maybe I'm a purple unicorn", she muttered with heavy sarcasm. Then as they left Kave shouted, "If they can't see what is right in front of their eyes, make them see it!"

Jemima stopped abruptly anchoring Victoria back a bit. They both listened on. Kave continued, "And if that doesn't work, keep on trying until you die."

Victoria whispered something quietly that Kave barely caught.

"Thank you, Kave."

* * *

"Let's go back to the Junkyard and try again", Victoria boldly stated and Jemima agreed wholeheartedly.

Jemima arrived at the Junkyard gate pushing Victoria out of sight. She called out, "Admetus!"

A few seconds passed before she heard an answer, "Jem?!"

"Admetus, please let…me in", she pleaded in a soft tone. Admetus opened the gate and promptly Jemima pulled Victoria along with her. They pushed past the surprised Admetus and into the Junkyard with long strides.

"Wait, Jemima!"

No use, she was gone…just like flower petals left, floating away in the wind.

* * *

Jemima pulled Victoria after her with a fire burning in her eyes. They reached the middle of the Junkyard to the astonishment of everyone.

"Old Deuteronomy", Jemima addressed the Jellicle Leader, who was sitting on the platform as always.

"This is a surprise", Old Deuteronomy paused for a second. Taking advantage of the momentary silence, Jemima began to sing.

**Can you see me now?  
Can you see me now?**

**All this weeping in the air  
Who can tell where it will fall?  
Through floating forests in the air  
'Cross the rolling open sea**

Old Deuteronomy furrowed his brow as he listened to the song. Just like the other songs, it had a sad defiant air about it. The lyrics were truly a riddle to him.

**Blow a kiss, I run through air  
Leave the past, find nowhere  
Floating forests in the air  
Clowns all around you Clowns that only let you know  
Where you let your senses go  
Clowns all around you  
It's a cross I need to bear**

Jemima took a deep breath and Victoria took the chance to jump in.

**All this black and cruel despair  
This is an emergency  
Don't you hide your eyes from me  
Open them and see me now**

**Can you see me now?  
Can you see me now?**

They sang the last two lines together. Old Deuteronomy sat there with an expression of slight amusement.

"Very interesting", Old Deuteronomy spoke softly. Victoria snorted in disbelief, "You didn't hear any of it, did you?"

"I assure you, I am not deaf."

"You only heard the words and notes, but you didn't hear the meaning, did you?" Victoria raised one eyebrow in challenge.

"Would you care to explain the song to us then?" Old Deuteronomy sighed half impatiently. Jemima stopped Victoria and said, "When you understand the meaning of the song, maybe then you'll accept us."

Alonzo inhaled sharply, wondering about the lyrics. Why had they mentioned clowns? There was much to learn.

"They're not ready", Victoria told Jemima and nodding to each other they began to leave. Suddenly Demeter reached out and begged, "Please stay. Don't leave again."

"Demeter, if you wont accept me the way I am, then you are no sister of mine and I will have no will to stay", Jemima whispered quietly.

"Just one more night, think it over", Demeter whispered with watery eyes. Jemima looked away.

"Fine", Victoria answered. Jemima and Demeter looked at her totally unprepared for that. Victoria said, "We'll stay this one night and think it over."

* * *

Jemima and Victoria stayed in a separate den together for the night. Victoria explained to Jemima that it was the last favor for Demeter. Morning came too soon and the pair walked out the den fully prepared to leave. Alonzo stopped them halfway and sadly looked at them both.

"What's wrong?" Jemima asked anxiously.

"Old Deuteronomy…was poisoned last night", Alonzo gulped nervously watching Victoria intently.

"Is he…alright?"

"The Jellicle Leader…is unfortunately…dead", Alonzo managed to stutter out. Jemima's eyes went wide in disbelief while Victoria could only gape.

"The worst part is…you two are the main suspects."

**Again, apology for the short chapter and any mistakes I made. This was written a little too quickly. Sorry! Please review!**


	11. White Robe

**A/N: Sorry for the 3-4 days wait...I think. I've been thinking about this chapter a lot. I'm not sure I like it. I'm bumping the rating of this story up to T for some violent scenes...**

**To my magnificent, hyper, fan-fiction-loving reviewers:**

**To em0Xpryncez: Interesting accent. Sorry for being so cruel, I promise I will look at your story right after I finish uploading this. I'm not sure I like the shipper name.**

**To mutinykitten: Sorry! I meant I rushed while writing. I'm glad it's getting better. You're forgiven for not reviewing Chapter 9. :) I hope you like this chapter as well....it's a little different from the others.**

**To JemiiNMistoFTW: A lot of people seem to be saying the same thing. Lol. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Note: Loosely based on the song, White Robe, by t.A.T.u.**

**WARNING!  
1. If you don't like violence, please don't complain about it! This was...necessary for the story.  
2. If you love either Alonzo or Munkustrap a whole lot...you may want to exit right now.  
3. Angst.**

_

* * *

Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands._ - _Ernest Gaines._

_One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching. - Anonymous._

_Every man dies. Not every man really lives. - William Ross Wallace.  
_

_A good death does honor to a whole life. - Petrarch._

_

* * *

All the lies they keep on selling  
But you never check the spelling_

Flying bullets  
Hit the targets  
Wings and halos  
5 to 7  
In this white robe  
Through the darkness  
Paragliding  
Back to heaven

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_"The Jellicle Leader…is unfortunately…dead", Alonzo managed to stutter out. Jemima's eyes went wide in disbelief while Victoria could only gape._

_"The worst part is…you two are the main suspects."_

* * *

"We were in our den the whole night", Victoria protested, her head dizzy from events happening too quickly. Alonzo grimaced, "I believe you, but some others don't. Use your words to convince _them_."

"Will it be hard to convince them?" Jemima managed to ask. The black and white tom just looked her in the eye.

* * *

Munkustrap, being the Jellicle Protector, brought the two of them forward and asked, "Did you poison Old Deuteronomy?"

Victoria sighed heavily and gave him an, "I can't believe you're actually doing this", look. When she saw that his face was totally serious she answered, "Of course not."

"Did you ask someone else to poison Old Deuteronomy?" Munkustrap returned quicker than Victoria could think. Before Victoria could say a word, Jemima intervened, "Munkustrap, look at us."

She paused, waiting for the Jellicle Protector to look. When he did she whispered, "Do you think we are capable of that?"

"I don't know, anymore", Munkustrap replied, his face stony and devoid of any sympathy. Jemima sighed, "No, we didn't ask anyone to poison him."

Victoria held up her paws, "Why do you think we would kill him?"

"Old Deuteronomy was morally right in everyway and would not accept whatever it is you two think is love", Munkustrap glared.

"We didn't kill him", Jemima pleaded, "We were in the den the whole night."

Suddenly Munkustrap turned to Victoria, eyes blazing with anger, "Where's your collar?"

"My collar?" Victoria asked confused. She reached up a paw to her neck and was surprised to find that it was bare.

"What does losing my collar have anything to do with this?" Victoria furrowed her brow and looked up at the Jellicle Protector. Munkustrap waved Admetus forward.

In Admetus' paw was Victoria's collar, which everyone could recognize, since it pure white and delicate. Jemima's eyes grew wide and she gasped, "What is…how?"

"This was found in Old Deuteronomy's den this morning", Admetus looked down, unwilling to look into Jemima's eyes. The calico gave a short disbelieving laugh and stated, "We're being framed! I mean finding a collar right at the scene of the crime is way too coincidental!"

"What would you do in my place?" Munkustrap asked with half-hooded eyes. Victoria closed her eyes and whispered, "So this is what it comes to?"

"Do you still deny?" His voice was low and deadly. Victoria narrowed her eyes and sighed, "We poisoned Deuteronomy, what of it?"

"Victoria, what are saying?" Jemima cried out. The white queen turned to Jemima with sad eyes. The way her mouth was pulled back, Jemima could tell what Victoria was thinking. No matter what they said or did, the Jellicle would think they were guilty. It was useless to deny. Whoever framed them, wanted this to happen. Victoria was surrendering.

Munkustrap growled down in the back of his throat and hissed, "I will kill you."

"Will you?" Victoria was as calm as ever.

The Jellicles said nothing.

"What's wrong with you all?" Jemima screamed in anguish.

The Jellicles said nothing.

"He's going to kill us and you won't even say a word?" Jemima yelled as loud as she could. Tears streamed down her face. Victoria closed her eyes willing the pain to go away. Jemima stood helpless and gasped for breath.

Before any words came out, Munkustrap sprang into Victoria knocking her back. Totally unprepared, she flew backwards and while she was getting up, the Jellicle Protector, ironically, attacked her again. This time Victoria braced herself for the blow and slid back a few inches before springing off.

The Jellicles did nothing.

The white queen barreled into Munkustrap knocking him backwards as her claws sank into his shoulder. Hissing in pain, he swiped at her face. She barely dodged it. Pushing away, Victoria landed three feet away from him. Munkustrap bared his teeth and lunged forward knocking her away.

The Jellicles did nothing.

Victoria winced and then hissed, "If you're going to try and kill me, I wish you the best of luck."

"Don't be arrogant about this", Munkustrap bit back and slashed at her shoulders. Victoria caught his paw, pulled him forward and dug her claws deep into his stomach. Then while their faces were mere inches apart she breathed, "Remember that I was born an alley cat."

Her eyes momentarily dulled and then she pulled away, red blood seeping from the wound. Munkustrap narrowed his eyes and said, "Fine, if you're taking this seriously, I will too."

He swiped at her so fast she couldn't dodge. Skidding back she clutched her wounded shoulder. Suddenly Alonzo leapt into the middle of the fight and shouted, "Stop!"

Both Munkustrap and Victoria looked at him in surprise. Alonzo inhaled deeply and whispered huskily, "I'll fight for you guys."

The Jellicle Protector raised one eyebrow as Victoria answered, "That's alright. I've got this."

"I have no doubt about that, but let me do this", Alonzo implored, "I've been a coward my whole life. I've always followed the rules blindly and did everything I was told. I want a chance to change that fact."

Victoria looked at him with wide eyes. Then the black and white tom swallowed hard, "Please."

Nodding numbly, the white queen stepped away and towards Jemima. Alonzo stepped forward in her place and looked at Munkustrap dead in the eyes.

"If you want to murder them, first kill me", Alonzo sighed, "Not to be cliché, but…get ready!"

Munkustrap gave a feral snarl and swiped towards Alonzo. Then he pushed forward and pushed Alonzo into a wall, pinning him there.

The Jellicles watched with stony faces.

"There's a reason I'm Jellicle Protector and you're the second-in-command, Alonzo", Munkustrap spat out. Alonzo angrily pushed him back and yelled, "If there's a reason for it, why are you hurting Jellicles instead of protecting them!?!?"

"They killed my father and so they are no longer Jellicles!" Munkustrap yelled back. It was becoming more of a verbal match. Alonzo took the opening and lunged towards Munkustrap throwing him into a nearby wall. Munkustrap slashed down in defense, accidently catching the other's throat.

Alonzo fell back gripping his own neck, eyes narrowed in pain and surprise. Then he went forward and staggered towards the Jellicle Protector. He reached out and pulled Munkustrap forward. Munkustrap was still in a state of shock.

"So you would kill me, huh?" Alonzo gasped. "I guess that's what brothers are for."

Then without warning, Alonzo used his last strength and tossed Munkustrap into the wall hard. The Jellicle Protector's head snapped forward and he was unconscious. The tall black and white tom staggered back, still holding onto his wound.

The Jellicles did nothing.

Victoria and Jemima yelled out and ran towards him. It was too late. Alonzo fell back.

The Jellicles watched.

Jemima reached out slowly.

Alonzo gasped, he had no regrets.

Victoria cried out.

Alonzo hoped his father would be proud. His father had always told him to stand for what he believed in. For awhile Alonzo had thought him a fool. But now…he supposed he was a bigger fool.

He was dead before he hit the ground.

**I warned you, didn't I? I hope you're still reading, even though I killed someone. Please review! I really do love reviews!**

**Oh yeah! So far what I've planned is that next chapter will be the last "official" chapter and then after that I will have an epilogue. So just a heads up...telling you this story is almost over...**


	12. Ending: Cosmos

**A/N: As of this chapter, this story is officially over. I think it was fun while it lasted, but now I feel a little sad. This is one of my first "deep" and "meaningful" stories. I hope everyone will enjoy this story. I would put a warning telling you that this ending is really sad etc, but you've already read this far and deserve to see the ending anyway. As I said in Chapter 8 or so, there are two endings, you can choose in your own mind.**

**It's sort of funny, after I killed off Alonzo, a bunch more people reviewed! Maybe I should just kill characters more often.  
**

**To my kool, fantastic, amazing reviewers:**

**To Don't know Don't care 38: I am honored that you read this story. Thank you for reading! I hope you like this ending!**

**To Tuggers'Lil'Princess: Good luck with that. Thanks for reading! I hope you like this ending!**

**To PlatoLuvr-08: It seems that most people who read this story don't like femslash, interesting. Thanks for reading! I hope you like this ending!**

**To mutinykitten: I'm not trying to torment you. :) Sorry for that. Thanks for reading! I hope you like this ending.**

**To jellicle-artist: Sorry about making you depressed, I will say that this ending will definitely make you super depressed. But I'm glad that it makes you think. Thanks for reading! I hope you like the ending anyway.**

**To bob: Thanks for reading! I hope you like this ending!**

**Note: Loosely based on the songs, Cosmos by t.A.T.u.**

* * *

_Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Dr. Suess._

_Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail. - Ralph Waldo Emerson._

_Homophobia is a social disease._ - _Bumper sticker. (No, I don't agree with it, but I'm just showing what society is like.)_

_

* * *

Fly away, time machine  
Clouds - we will chase them out  
Crowds, we will face them down  
This is our secret place  
Outer space, outer space  
Our home forever is outer space  
Black stars and endless seas, outer space  
New hope, new destinies; outer space  
Forever we'll be in  
Outer space, outer space_

_

* * *

From previous chapter:_

_He was dead before he hit the ground._

* * *

Jemima cried out again and kneeled next to Alonzo's still form. She looked at his blank eyes and tried to tear her eyes away from the gruesome sight, but she couldn't. Victoria stood still watching little droplets of water drip down Jemima's cheeks slowly. The Jellicles were surprised, but most were still not moving.

Cassandra and Exotica rushed forward and checked on Alonzo. They crowded around the body and not a word could express what each was feeling at that very moment.

"Victoria", Jemima said very numbly. The white queen reached out and pulled Jemima into a tight embrace. The calico whimpered, "Please, let us leave this place. This is our fault."

"It wasn't our fault", Victoria tried convincing herself, along with Jemima, that those words were true. Jemima pleaded, "Please, let's leave."

Munkustrap groaned loudly and sat up rubbing his head. When his eyelids lifted, his eyes showed great remorse. He hadn't meant to kill his brother. Just to defend himself, but instead…

The Jellicle Protector got up and did what he thought Old Deuteronomy would want him to do.

"I'm sorry, Alonzo. I hope you can forgive me."

Jemima spun around and pushed Munkustrap roughly. That got everyone's attention. She screamed, "Forgive? Tell me something, Munkustrap. I thought you were a great tom. What happened? Did you change?"

"I didn't change", Munkustrap glared at her with a bitter expression, "You are the one that has changed."

Jemima crumpled down and began to sob. Victoria rushed forward and said, "We don't want anymore bloodshed on our account. We're leaving."

"Hold it!" Munkustrap shouted. The white queen turned around slowly.

"You killed Old Deuteronomy! Do you think you'll get away with it?" Munkustrap roared and pounded the nearby wall. Victoria's eyes were calm as she whispered, "I see. Is this what it's all about? You're throwing a tantrum because your father is dead? I can relate, just don't pull others into this."

"You killed him", Munkustrap hissed angrily. The white queen almost rolled her eyes. Jemima turned to the Jellicles and pleaded, "Electra, Cassandra, Exotica, Misto and Tugger. I thought you supported us."

Misto turned away as did Tugger. Electra bit her lip nervously as Cassandra backed away. Exotica was nowhere to be seen. Victoria sighed, "I get it."

"Since you were both Jellicles once, I will lessen the punishment. You two are to be separated forever. Jemima will stay here and Victoria, you will be going to India with your aunt and brother." Munkustrap rapped out, sounding very much in charge. Jemima wanted to protest, but there would be no use. No one was supporting them anymore.

Demeter pulled Jemima away before she could do anything. The calico's spirit felt broken and she let herself be led away like a doll. Victoria made no attempt to follow, since Munkustrap and Admetus together were too much for her.

The white queen had an idea. She turned to Munkustrap with lifeless eyes and asked, "Can I please visit Old Deuteronomy's den and apologize?"

"Sure", Munkustrap was surprised at Victoria's show of regret. Then the white queen continued, "After that, may I visit Jemima one more time?"

Munkustrap considered the idea for a moment, "Fine, but in front of all the Jellicles."

"Thank you, Munkustrap", Victoria murmured.

* * *

Jemima buried her face into her paws and sobbed. Life hurt so much.

* * *

At the goodbye for Victoria, Jenny and Misto, all the Jellicles were gathered. It was raining very hard. Jemima looked at Victoria with those blank eyes that were as dead as Alonzo's. The white queen reached out to hug Jemima. Then mid-hug, Victoria slipped something into Jemima's paw.

Jemima looked into her paw. It was a vial of something watery. Victoria looked at Jemima with sad eyes. The look alone could freeze the warmest summer day.

The calico looked up, catching the look, and nodded. Suddenly, in unison, the two popped open the top and quickly downed the two vials. Jemima let go and it fell to the floor with a smash. Glass shards flew everywhere.

Munkustrap's eyes widened. Victoria looked at everyone around her and said, "Those were two vials of poison that I found in Old Deuteronomy's den. They weren't mine. I guess Old Deuteronomy might have accidently poisoned himself to death."

The Jellicles were speechless. The white queen breathed, "You forced us to do this."

Admetus looked confused. Jemima whispered, "The song that we sang to Old Deuteronomy, the one about clowns, has a meaning. You are all clowns. People with smiles. We were telling you to open your eyes and see us for who we really are."

Electra thought for a moment. Maybe if she had stepped forward and helped them, this wouldn't have happened.

"There is no antidote", Victoria breathed slowly, answering the question that most Jellicles had in mind at the moment. Jemima fell down and cried out in pain. Seconds later, Victoria did the same.

The Jellicles all rushed forward. Jemima croaked, "Are we finally free?"

"No", Victoria answered, her lungs felt too tight. It was hard to talk, "We'll never be free."

Jemima felt the rain patter her relentlessly. Victoria chuckled quietly, "But in the end, we've won. Because you weren't able to keep us apart. We're together now. Forever and there's nothing you can do about it."

It hurt so much. Her sight became blurry and she felt weak. As they both sank into oblivion, Jemima whispered, "Look, the sky is crying for us."

* * *

**Epilogue: Back to the Beginning**

_Years later_

Bombalurina brought two young queens into Munkustrap's den. Years had passed since that day when Jemima and Victoria had died. Munkustrap had succeeded his father as Jellicle Leader. Admetus was Jellicle Protector. Electra, Cassandra and Exotica had left the Junkyard and Munkustrap let them, thinking that they'd be back. They hadn't returned.

Bombalurina sighed, "You need to explain to them, Munkustrap."

Munkustrap turned around and said, "Now, you two have to understand that queens don't love each other in the way you think."

The two kittens merely looked confused. Munkustrap sighed, but was determined that no one would get hurt this time.

He said, "Let me tell you a story. There were two queens, one named Victoria and the other Jemima and…."

**A/N: Does the ending sound weird? It's meaning is that even after Jemima and Victoria have died, most Jellicles still don't get it. But Munkustrap isn't necessarily a "bad" guy, he's doing what he believes in and wants everyone to be safe in the end.**

**I'm not trying to say that if you're a gay or lesbian, the only way to be accepted is by running away or suicide. This story is saying that you shouldn't be afraid to be yourself and even in the end, if no one believes in you, at least be with someone who loves you freely. I hope this story sounded at least a little realistic and makes you think on this.**

**Thanks to all 14 reviewers:  
**

**Don't know Don't care 38, Catdancergirl, Alex0821, Alphoscapsy-cola, PSYchOtiC-teNdencieS, mutinykitten, mistofan101, em0XprYncez, ****Tuggers'Lil'Princess, Jemidancer2011, jellicle-artist, JemiiNMistoFTW, PlatoLuvr-08 and bob.**

**P.S. I hope I can get 50 reviews! :) So review?  
**


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